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The Proportion of The World's Spending, Population, and Consumption of Resources


Febri91 5 / 6 2  
Jan 19, 2016   #1
The pie charts below show World Spending, World population and Consumption of Resources

The pie chart gives information about the proportion of the world's spending, population, and consumption of resources. Overall, USA and Europe have a less population than Asia, but for the utilization of raw materials, those use the most of the sources. It is also important to note that the significant proportion for the world's spending is expending on food.

Following this chart, most of the world's resources is consumed by three-fifths American and European, while two-fifths of the rest is consumed by other countries. On the contrary, inhabitants in America and Europe are just under a quarter. This is smaller than Asia which has nearly three-fifths inhabitants of the world, while Africa and other countries have minority populations.

Turning to the world's expending, there are five kinds that people commonly spend the wealth. The large proportion, nearly a quarter people expend money on food, whilst the very small number of people spends on collecting clothes. People also expend more money on housing and transport which have less than a third of proportion, and two-fifths society use for other needs.




faarasyad 7 / 15 7  
Jan 19, 2016   #2
Hi Febri91,

The pie chart gives information about the proportion of the world's spending...

here is my correction for your introduction.
The pie charts illustrate the proportion between worldwide expenditures and global consumption of resources, compared with the proportion of worldwide people. Overall, nearly all the majority of expense is used for other sectors. While the number of people in USA and Europe experiences as the second highest population, those countries devote much more money in world consumption.

thanks and good luck!!!
vangiespen - / 4,137 1449  
Jan 19, 2016   #3
... but for the utilization of raw materials, those use the most of the sources...

... world's resources is ARE consumed by three-fifths American and European, while two-fifths of the rest is consumed by other countries. On the contrary, inhabitants in America and Europe are just under a quarter. This is smaller than Asia which has nearly three-fifths inhabitants of the world, while Africa and other countries have minority populations.

- Question, why are you discussing minority populations when the charts don't make any reference to this? You are only supposed to refer to provided information that comes from the chart since that is verifiable.

...the world's expending SPENDING, there are five kinds that OF people THAT commonly spend theIR wealth. ... nearly a quarter OF people expend SPEND money on food, ...People also expend SPEND more money on ...

You seem to have some misconceptions about the chart. You better double check your report information with the data provided int he chart just to make sure your report summary is accurate. You could lose points for any or all misconstrued facts.

Febri, yours is one of the more perfected versions of this summary report. The grammar that you used is fairly advanced and shows that you are capable of more advanced English word usage and logical development. These attributes will ensure that this essay would get a higher than average but a little lower than perfect score had it been an actual IELTS test.

...USA and Europe have a lessER population than Asia, ... those TWO COUNTRIES use the most of the sources. ...spending is expending on food.

... world's resources is ARE consumed by three-fifths OF THE AmericanS and EuropeanS, while two-fifths of the rest is consumed ... On the contrary OTHER HAND, inhabitants in OF America and Europe are just under a quarter. ...

Turning to the world's expending EXPENSES, ... kinds that OF people THAT commonly ... ... quarter people expend SPEND money on food, whilst WHILE A the very small number of people spends on collecting clothes. People also expend SPEND more money on housing and transport ... two-fifths OF society use THE MONEY for ...
Niam01 6 / 7 2  
Jan 20, 2016   #4
Overall, USA and Europe have a less population than Asia
suggestion, population in Asia is the largest proportion in the world
....It is also important to note that the significant different proportion for the world's spending is expending on food.
Fauzi17 6 / 6 1  
Jan 20, 2016   #5
The pie chartS gives information about COMPARE the proportion of the world's ...
... while Africa and other countries have minority populations. CONTINENT HAVE A VERY SMALL PROPORTION.
... five kinds that people commonly spend SPENT the wealth. The largeST proportion, nearly a quarter people expend DEVOTE money on food, whilst ...
... on housing and transport which have less than a third of proportion, and two-fifthsPERCENT OF society use for other needs.


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