IELTS - pros and cons; working or traveling before starting university studies

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decided to do this.

Nowadays most of teenagers get the chance of attending a university subject. The start time is a common topic of discussion when some countries recommend them to spend a year for working or traveling after their high school and before entering university.

One cannot deny that traveling and working always make life more meaningful and practical and it gives young people new insights to way of living. When one works, he/she finds the value of job with more ease. Therefore he/she takes educating more seriously. Besides from their new experiences they can choose their area of interest education more carefully. Moreover this is an opportunity which they can work voluntarily and travel freely since there are not many things they are responsible for compared to their future that they have to meet the needs of their family and themselves.

However, there are some disadvantages. Teenagers are not mature enough to know how to spend their money. They may easily waste it for bad habits like smoking and drinking. During the trip they may be defrauded .Besides enjoyment of visiting new places and earning money may make them uninterested or reluctant to study. In fact a year gap between two stages of education has impacts on their feeling and ambition. It even can encourage them to quit their studies. It is also worth noting that these activities can be deferred to future time since if they work they don't do it as a professional and well-trained. Moreover there is no need to travel for an entire year.

In conclusion, there are pros and cons for discussion. I think taking a break from study to work or travel can give them a perspective of what they are going to do and why.

a chance

starting time not start time

I advice you to use this
When they finish school, teenagers face the dilemma of whether to get a rest or continue their education in the beginning of the introduction

start the body paragraphs
with On the on hand
On the other hand

1.Therefore takes education more seriously...
2.Besides gaining new experiences it can also help them to choose their subject of interest.
3.opportunity "where " they can work voluntarily.
4.since they do not have much responsibilities at that point of time compared to future when they have to meet the needs of the family too.

thanks Abdul and dolly for your kind answers:)

Good point!

I also want to thank you for all the work you have been doing here, Maryam. You help people a lot, and it must take up much of your time when you are working with their essays. We appreciate you!

You have an intro and conclusion that are both very short. The intro and conclusion both give the main message of the essay, and therefore, they should be full and meaningful. At the beginning and end of an essay like this, you should give one meaningful observation... something interesting and special. It is the RESULT of the contemplation you did for the essay. It is not enough to just say you think it is good to take a break and get perspective... share a sentence that includes your special insight, the conclusion you find after deeply considering this issue.

:-)