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IELTS Writing Task 2: Public Transport, convenient metro


Anthracene 1 / 3  
Sep 2, 2021   #1
Topic:
Public transportation is a great way to travel, particularly within a metropolis. The metro is the most convenient way to get around a city.
Do you agree or disagree?


The worldwide introduction of metro systems has revolutionized the way of traveling in densely populated cities. Henceforth, urban areas residents have voiced agreements as they recognize it as the most favorable means for public mobility. The convenience of underground rails could be proven via two main aspects, which this essay would discuss.

Possibly the most worth-mentioning factor contributing to metro system effectiveness is their affordable cost, especially for inhabitants of lower classes. To illustrate, a significant fraction of underground railway passengers are economic migrants, whose income is hardly sufficient for private vehicles, and government subsidies could grant them better chances to travel. Additionally, underground railway systems' requirements for annual maintenance and staff costs are only a fraction compared to that of other public means of transport. For instance, taxis operation demands enormous human resources for coordination and customer service, which accumulates to augment the final fee.

Another property of metro systems that further enhance city travelers' experience is their time efficiency compared to conventional methods. One reason is that railway's schedules remain active throughout the day, thereby becoming tailor-made for the fast-paced lifestyles required for urban citizens. Furthermore, subway passengers are blessed with a complete absence of congestion, as the nonexistence of obstruction assists bullet trains to go at full throttle. As a result, time wasted on traffic jams and the frustration thereof can be obliterated, thus increase the workforce's productivity.

In conclusion, this essay has advocated the practicality of subway stations in the urban environment based on the mentioned arguments.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 11,707 3785  
Sep 3, 2021   #2
The writer did not respond to the discussion prompt. There is no agree or disagree reference in response to the question. This essay fails to follow the response format requirements. For the writer's reference:

Discussion Question: Do you agree or disagree?
Response: The convenience of underground rails could be proven via two main aspects (Prompt Deviation ) , which this essay would discuss.
Final Response: ... this essay has advocated the practicality of subway stations in the urban environment based on the mentioned argument (Prompt Deviation)

The essay has not addressed the discussion requirement because it has changed the discussion topic. Since the writer's response is not aligned with the requirements, the essay will not be able to achieve a passing score in 2 sections; TA and C + C. Both of these sections require on point discussion targets in relation to the prompt. The essay will fail.
nitakajole 2 / 4 1  
Sep 3, 2021   #3
@Anthracene
Hi i think you should express your own opinion related the topic, for example if their asking you between agree and disagree you can choose one between them and make a supporting detail from your own chosen.
BlackNikeSock 1 / 3 1  
Sep 4, 2021   #4
I think you should clearly state your thesis in the first paragraph of the essay and then prove it throughout the essay. hope this helps.
OP Anthracene 1 / 3  
Sep 4, 2021   #5
Thank you guys so much for the suggestions! I've missed that!
At first, I thought lightly of the Task Achievements part, so I didn't anticipate this kind of flaw.

All in all, my opinion needs to be clarified right away in the introduction and conclusion, as the discussion topic is "Do you agree or disagree about <thesis>?" Regarding Task Achievements, proving my points only comes after clearly stating my thesis. Do you think in what else aspects can my essay be improved?


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