Unanswered [5] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3


Does punishment is necessary for children?


chouchou 1 / -  
May 20, 2022   #1
It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?


What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behavior to children?


Educational tactics play a pivotal role in forming a civilized world, hence orientating children to the right is indispensible. While an army of people believe that punishment could teach children to discriminate between right and wrong effectively, this essay will partly disagree with this opinion before outlining thư appropriate penalty.

On the one hand, it is reasonable that punishment is more discouraging to a certain degree. First, the kids could suffer from obsession prompted by harsh retributions. In fact, the adults may abuse the children acting naughtily, which in turn could leave them highly susceptible to a wide range of both mental and physical conditions, such as depression or injuries on body. Another problem is unsuitable penalties could trigger mistaken actions. Undoubtedly, the youth is rather rebellious and sensitive in some contexts, thus if parents' incorrect handling, typically excessively take control on their child, constantly occurs, this might not only make the youngster desire to wrongdoings but also have an enormous influence on their manners, which is the root of one's personality.

On the other hand, moderate-level punishment without insulting and violation should be taken into consideration to educate the boys and girls to be well-behaved. One efficacious punishment is not giving the misbehave what they are craving for. Particularly, if a young individual behaves in the wrong way, parents should explain how discourteous this action is for them or stop accommodating them their favorite objects or wishes such as purchasing toys, taking them to the theme park with the view to admonishing . Consequently, they might notice the adverse repercussion and then make a herculean effort not to be at fault again.

To conclude, severe retribution could be more disadvantaged to some extent attributed to triggering excruciating feelings on the kids' bodies and memory, therefore mild punishment is recommended as a viable approach to differentiate right and wrong.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,835 4783  
May 21, 2022   #2
The writer has several errors in this essay that need to be addressed. He has tried his best to present an educated and logical discussion regarding the topic but, he has not adhered to the formatting requirements for the response. Without proper addressing of the questions, the logic of his essay will not meet the task accuracy requirements.

A task 2 essay first paragraph is composed of the prompt restatement and personal opinion. That means, the paragraph should be composed of 3-5 sentences that present the writer's understanding of the topic. A basic representation of the discussion is required, but not a personal opinion at the start. The paraphrase should not indicate the writer's opinion in the first sentence. This must be properly blended into his opinion sentence via the correct reasoning thesis. When the writer presents an opinion at the start, he automatically circumvents the original topic foundation, leading to a prompt restatement inaccuracy and lower paragraph score.

The writer's statement should not merely repeat the instructions and questions provided. Instead, he is expected to represent the full discussion paragraph presentations through a shortened or summarized opinion + thesis statement. The clarity of his opinion and the reasoning behind it will be scored in this section. Therefore, restating the instructions will mean he will not receive any points for that part of the paragraph. An opinion response without a direct question resonponse = Partial score for the writer's opinion.

The phrases "On the one hand" and "On the other hand" are used only when discussing comparisons of the same topic, based on 2 different points of view. Since the writer is responding to 2 different questions in each paragraph, the phrases cannot be used as a cohesive tool. The essay is faulty when it comes to cohesive paragraph presentation because of this error.
Jenny3110 1 / 2  
May 27, 2022   #3
Although you have written that you will outline the appropriate penalty at the introduction, I hardly see it on the essay.


Home / Writing Feedback / Does punishment is necessary for children?
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳