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The quantity of students which join in the Secondary School, in three different years


M3L1 26 / 6 11  
Nov 6, 2015   #1
This table displayed the quantity of students which join in the Secondary School, in three different years. Overall, there are essential changes in calculation of each school.

It is evidence that in Specialist Schools, the percentage of student's presence are slightly decrease of from year 2000 to 2009. In the Grammar Schools, the percentage fall significantly, by the end of the year it is just a half than the first year. In Voluntary-controlled Schools can be seen that the number of declining is very extreme, it has decreasing by 14% in 2005, and has fell 18% more in the last year.

However, in Community Schools, the attendances percentage have an amuse increment. In the second year, it has rose more than twice as the first one. The most important thing is that Community School has the highest percentage in the very end of the year compare to all schools in the same time.




vangiespen - / 4,137 1449  
Nov 6, 2015   #2
Meliana, while I will agree with the others about the existing grammar problems in your essay. It does not erase the fact that the ssay you developed presented the facts of the chart in a light and interesting manner. It would have really helped the essay tremendously if the light hearted tone was carried through with the proper grammar usage and sentence structuring. However, since you are not a native English speaker, the examiner will most likely allow for a margin of error in your essay. Although not that much, so you have to really work on polishing your grammar as best as you can. Let me help you out with my own grammar suggestions for your reference in this essay. Hopefully you will be able to keep those suggestions in mind as you develop your other practice tests.

This table displayed the quantity of students which WHO join ENROLLED in the Secondary School, in COVERING three different years. Overall, there are WERE essential changes in THE calculation of STUDENT ENROLLMENT FOR each school.
wulanaulia 1 / 4  
Nov 7, 2015   #3
Hello Meiliana enjoy your day

This table displayed the quantity of students whichwho join in the Secondary School, in three different years.
based on Simon, it is better task 1 divides into 4 paragraph. Introduction, conclusion, bodies 1 and bodies 2

Overall, there are essential changes in calculation of each schoolyou can explain more,but without mention number .

... of student's presence are slightly decreasedecreased it is past tense of from year 2000 to 2009.
... the number of declining is very extreme, it has ...

In the second year, it has rosedouble verb more than twice as the first one.


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