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Raising petrol price must be the last solution for controlling traffic and pollution


phantan252 2 / -  
Mar 4, 2013   #1
Hi guys, This is my essay. Hope to receive your feedback :D

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. Do you agree or disagree ?

Whether or not the increasing in the petrol price is the number one method to avoid the growing traffic and polluted environment has aroused a controversy among concerning people in the modern life. Personally, I am more inclined to the latter viewpoint on the grounds of economic and society.

Undeniably, no sooner the price of petrol been risen than it obligatorily face to opposite thinking of most of citizens. Initially, not only this method affect directly to every pocket of customers but it also creates inflation to the whole economic whilst other products become more expensive, especially products from use-petrol industries. Additionally, it feasibly leads to negative thinking in low salary employees. Eventually, it is plausible to become one of the main reasons of increasing illegal activities and put social security at risks.

More importantly, this is no only one way to solve these problems. Publishing ideas about using clean-source vehicles such as bicycle or electronic cars, electronic bicycle is also a effective solution. Equally remarkable, only by renovating the infrastructure of the cities can growing traffic issue be resolved. For instance, when obtaining more over bridges, the traffic jam in Ha Noi capital reduced dramatically in recent years.

For the mentioned justifications, it is my firm belief that the increasing the cost of the petrol is only the last method and hardly contribute in resolving these problems. It is more advisable to propose other ways which more suitable than the former way be.

(244 words)

mhss 18 / 53 18  
Mar 5, 2013   #2
Hi,
Your range of grammar and vocabulary are really impressive.
Make a note on this
You will lose marks if your word count is less than 250.

Some printing mistakes,
More importantly, this is noT only one way to solve these problems.
electronic bicycle is also aN effective solution.

This sentence is not clear.
"Equally remarkable, only by renovating the infrastructure of the cities can growing traffic issue be resolved"

This can be restructured by,
For instance,the traffic jam in Ha Noi capital WAS reduced dramatically AFTER CONSTRUCTION OF more FLY OVERS in recent years.

It is more advisable to propose other ways which ARE more suitable than the former way .

mhss.


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