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IELTS Task 1 Reasons Why Land Degradation Happen And 3 Regions Which Are Affected


Faridadwi18 67 / 104 13  
Sep 3, 2016   #1
The pie chart gives information about the proportion of the main causes of agricultural degradation. The table displays the percentage of the effect of degradation land in three different areas in the world during 1990s. Overall, the biggest reason why agricultural land was less productive is over-grazing and the most affected region was Europe.

Looking at the details, over-grazing had the biggest number of the reason why land degradation happen, at 35 percent outnumbering deforestation by 5 percent. Over-cultivation only 2 per cent lower than deforestation. While other had the least number of all reasons.

Europe became the most affected regions of land degradation, at 23 per cent outnumbering Oceania by 10 percent while the least was North America, at 5 per cent. Europe always had the highest percentage of all reasons except for over-grazing while Oceania had the highest number of using graze too much. In over-cultivation, North America had the higher proportion than Oceania but smaller than Europe. Europe had the biggest number in deforestation while North America was the least.




sinahector 7 / 34  
Sep 3, 2016   #2
Hi
very good

Over-cultivation is only 2 percent lower than deforestation
While othershadhas the least number of all reasons

I think maybe it is better to write in present form

Best wishes
:)
akbarmappiare 31 / 469 275  
Sep 4, 2016   #3
FOLLOWING THAT, THERE IS The table WHICH displays the percentage of ...
Overall, the biggest reason why THE agricultural land was less productive IN THE ENTIRE WORLD is over-grazing and ...
Honestly, I really appreciate your endeavour because you have given the better progress more and more days. You have got the point of writing task 1. You could have present and highlight key features which looked the pictures. The information could be selected appropriately and described well in your overview. Apart from that, you have needed to enhance the sense of your writing. Focus on to make this smoother. You harness linking words to make this stay the good coherence track.

causes of agricultural degradation. The table displays

agricultural degradation. FOLLOWING THAT, THERE IS The table WHICH displays

... reason why land degradation happen, at REPRESENTING AT 35 percent AND outnumbering THE deforestation by 5 percent ONE-SIXTH. Over-cultivation IS only 2 per cent lower than THE deforestation. MEANWhile, THE other had the least ...

Farida, you try to vary the data between the percentage and fraction so that it can show your ability in the lexical resource.

Europe became the most affected regions (REPETITIVE) THE MOST DEGRADED AREA of land degradation OF SOME CLUSTERS at 23 per cent outnumbering ...

OVERALL, IT IS A GOOD JOB
GOOD LUCK
DmitryB 3 / 3  
Sep 11, 2016   #4
Hello, Faridadwi18!

Over-cultivation IS only 2 per cent lower than THE deforestation.

Another ways of describing figures:

just over/under
a little bellow/above
slightly more/less than
approximately
not nearly as high/low as
to widen/narrow (e.g. a gap/difference)

I hope it would be helpful for you!


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