Recently, some people prefer to build new job field instead of involving themselves in a company

Some people decide to start their own business instead of working for a company or organisation.
Do the advantages for people working for their own business outweigh the disadvantages?

Recently, some people prefer to build new job field instead of involving themselves in a company or organisation. Even though there are some bad effects for setting up new company, I extremely believe that the merits outweigh these drawbacks.

To begin, the people who have their own business can face some obstacles. The most general problem is meeting many competitors who are more versed in that sector. A new businessman has to make his company really stand out than others since the competition rate in business area is extremely tight especially in a metropolitan city. In addition, running business by themselves will not give guarantee that the company will be last long. If it does not work incidentally, they might face the bankrupt and have many debts.

However, building a new business also has some advantages. Initially, people can manage their time and activities independently since they do not have higher authorities who make every decision about the company. Another benefit is having more leisure time with family because there is not the interference from others. As the result, the people who earn money by their own business have more pleasure than who work for a company or organisasion.

To conclude, even though most people depend their life by involving in companies or organisasion, owning a business gives people freedom since they can control their own companies. However, starting a new company is not an easy job and it needs many skills for a businessman to begin it.

Hi Awe!!
I would like to highlight the thesis statement on your writing.

... Even though there are some bad effects for setting up new company, I extremely believe that the merits outweigh these drawbacks.

You say that the advantages outweigh than drawbacks. However, if I analyse your writing, the disadvantages that you provide are equal with the merits that you have mentioned in your writing.

You have to analyse carefully on the prompt. The task requires you to provide more advantages to disadvantages.
Tks :)