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The relationship between supervisors and co-employs in the working life


yika 6 / 12 1  
Dec 8, 2016   #1
The relationship between the supervisors and the co-employs in someone's working live is illustrated in two pie charts which are resulted on the survey in 2005 and 2009. Overall, these charts have the same pattern in the each of factors which be surveyed in 2005 and 2009 between these relationships.

Firstly, the highest percentage in the relationship with supervisor survey at 61 percent in 2005 which it is indicate a very good. In the opposite, the poor relationship shows the percentage by 59 percent in the same year. In the four years later, the very good relationship with supervisor slightly increase by 4 percent, but the poor relationship has some value at 2 percent in 2009 as much as in 2005.

Secondly, the relationship with co-workers in the survey in 2005 has the highest percentage at 63 percent as nine more as the fair relationship with co-employs. The lowest percentage is showed in the poor co-workers relationship and them who do not have co-workers in each at 1 percent. The percentage in 2009 almost increase in each factor, unless in the good relationship with co-employs at 25 percent which decreases than 4 years before. However, the highest percentage in very good co-workers relationship at 70 percent which it increased by 7 percent than in 2005.

OP yika 6 / 12 1  
Dec 8, 2016   #2
this is the picture of the essay



UQ17 3 / 4  
Dec 8, 2016   #3
Dear yuri
these are my corrections

firstly, you should attach the graph picture although it is simple thing but I regard that it is critical to assess your writing. Then, before you do the task you should notice the task question including details features. Make sure that task need is answered in your writing which is covered all aspects. In this case i saw that you do not considering about time signal therefore your writing is wrong tenses. Secondly is focus on meaning sentence and word formation because I read that your writing contains few mistakes related to the word formation or meaning sentence.

1. The relationship between (...) in two pie charts which are conducted on the survey ...

2. percent in 2005 which was indicate a very good

3. the poor relationship shows in the percentage by 59 percent in one year.

4. ... In the four years later, the very good relationship with supervisor WAS slightly increased by 4 percent, but the poor relationship has same value at 2 percent ...

5. changes all your sentence with appropriate tenses (PAST TENSES)


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