Unanswered [6] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 5


IELTS;"Responsible Tourist" - Agree or Disagree type essay


sharonpan 1 / 3  
Jan 4, 2014   #1
Please help me with my task 2. Thank you very much!

Being a "responsible tourist" has been paid attention to protect both environment and cultural of the place visited, while someone believe it is impossible to be a responsible tourist. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

When it comes to the discussion of responsible tourists, people's view points differ vastly, rendering this issue the highest complexity. Some people argue that tourists should take responsibility to protect the place, not only in the environmental facet, but also to the extent of culture, while other people hold the view that it is almost impossible to be a responsible tourist. To the extent of my observation, the former view holds water.

Our time has witnessed a society which is developing at such an unprecedented rate that anything we take as normal thing this second might as well turn into treasure right the next. In other word, it is required by our society that the tourists should try their best to protect the attraction keeps the same after their visit. Many local traditional cultures have extinct due to the proliferation of modern concepts, so it is absolutely the visitors' duty to protect native culture of the attraction from being impacted by their own points.

Admittedly, it is quite hard to keep the famous spots from being damaged unless someone isolated it. The increasing number of tourists makes it even more difficult to protect the local environment and culture from being influenced by human behaviour. However, we still should try hard to keep them as the original views. It is undeniable that if those attractions are distinct, who will be influenced most is no one but the tourist.

In conclusion, tourists are responsible to protect the local environment and culture. Only in this way can human beings benefit ourselves.
Pahan 1 / 1,906 553  
Jan 5, 2014   #2
When it comes to the discussion of responsible tourists, people's view points differ vastly, rendering this issue the highest complexity.

You should be more specific about who this responsible tourist. Introduce him, otherwise reader would wonder who that guy is.

Some people argue that tourists should take responsibility to protect the place, not only in the environmental facet, but also to the extent of culture,

... this sentence contains too much verbosity. Do not complicate sentences with too many words unnecessarily. Tell things simple and straight. Also, this is not actually your prompt speaks about. It says;

Being a "responsible tourist" has been paid attention to protect both environment and cultural of the place visited, while someone believe it is impossible to be a responsible tourist. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

... It defines who the responsible tourist and say some people view that it is impossible to be a responsible tourist. It is something different to what you said above. This topic revolves around the responsible citizen. Always stay with the prompt.
OP sharonpan 1 / 3  
Jan 5, 2014   #3
Thanks!! It's like I really need to improve my intro sentence.. Sometimes just dont know how to intro the topic! It's really helpful !
raj_ielts 3 / 11 2  
Jan 6, 2014   #4
Probably I think you can start with...'Now-a-days travelling around the world has become easier and faster and hence tourism Industry has become one of the major sources of revenue generation in country's economy'.

Pahan, is that going to work...or needs any improvement. :)
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Jan 13, 2014   #5
To the extent of my observation, the former view holds water.

State your opinion more direct and clear....
Your body paragraphs do not contain any specific examples that are important for scoring marks. Try this essay structure and read the following sample essays.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS;"Responsible Tourist" - Agree or Disagree type essay
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳