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Article Review: Zuckerberg and Chan Promise $3 Billion to Cure Every Disease


kiev 8 / 14 1  
Sep 28, 2016   #1
Up to $3 billions will be invested by Facebook Founder, Mark Zukeberg and his spouse Priscilla Chan to fight against all children's diseases in the next 10-years. About a year ago, after welcoming their first baby, Max, the couple announced 45 billions financial endowment named "Chan Zukeberg Initiative". Moreover, there are several world billionaires such as Bill Gates, Pierre Omidyar, Marc Benioff have donated to the organisation. Although there is no much information how the fund will go, they have invested in tech education startups in number of developing regions like India and Africa.

According to Zuckerberg, one of the plans is to create $600 million "BioHub" to in San Francisco, a collaborative projects, where researchers from Stanford, UCSF, UC Berkeley able to work together. He added his organisation's mission is concentrated on curing diseases so that people do not sick. In contrast, community focus on spends fifty times more investing in treating people who are sick.

justivy03 - / 2,367 607  
Sep 28, 2016   #2
Hi Oki, right off the bat, I noticed that you are very precise in your information, however, the unit of measurement, currency and symbols are also very important, not only to keep a uniform presentation of your review but more importantly, to create and cover all the facts that is needed to convey the right and factual message to your readers.

Having said that, below are my thoughts on your review;

- the couple announced $ 45 billions of - to the organiz ation.
- Although there is not much
- information on how the fund will go,

- $600 million "BioHub" to in San Francisco,
-UC Berkeley will be able to work together.
- He added his organisation'sthat the organizations mission is concentrated
- do notdoesn't go sick.
- In contrastOn the contrary ( contrast - is for color / contrary or contradiction - is for ideas ) ,
- community focused on
- spendsspending fifty times more in investing in treating people who are sick.

There you have it Oki, I hope the above remarks are helpful in your revision and make sure that for your future reference, you take your linking verbs and properly input them in the sentences.


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