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The rise of crime rate as the main worry in some countries. Solution? Invest in basic social rights.


Brunasingh 2 / 2  
Sep 16, 2016   #1
Each year, the crime rate increases. What are the causes of crime and what could be done to prevent this rise in criminal activity?

The increasements of crime rate are becoming the main worry of some countries. Poverty and the lower investment in basic rights cause this raising of criminal acts. This essay will show the main reason of the boosted of law violations and the best way to prevent.

The lack of investment in social rights are the main reason of the raising of crimes. Governments should spend better the public money guaranteeing good public education, basic sanitation conditions, access to public health to the marginalized population. Therefore, a person who lives without the basic social rights, who could never have a good education and a healthy place to leave, tend to committee a crime to survive their own environment. For instance, developed countries, as Sweden, which invests a lot in education, health, and other social rights has lower crime rate than in undeveloped countries, as Uganda, which a bunch of the population doesn't have access to a basic sanitation condition.

Consequently, to prevent crimes governments need to invest public income to the guarantee of more basic rights. The country finance should be widely shared with the social issues, as education and the access to the public hospitals. The effect can be realized in future: with a better live condition, the crime rate will decrease. Thus, the guarantee to a child the access to good public schools, a place to live with excellent basic sanitation, the right to have access to medication and hospitals, will give this child the opportunity to grow economically and socially. Then, difficulty a child with all these rights will commit a crime in future.

Hence, the investment in basic social rights is essential to prevent the increasements of crimes. Governments should stop excluding the population of their own rights and must spend the public income mainly in education and health.

Jnur 5 / 8  
Sep 16, 2016   #2
Here my suggestion.

1. Spelling mistakes? > increasements = increase (or you can rewrite your sentence "The increasing level of crime becoming a major problem for some countries".

2. in future = in the future (you should put the article "the" before the "future" , because it was definite article and it is used to refer to a time period)

3. Of the population = (I would like to suggest you to use a strong verb for "population". Strong verb is easier to read and use less words. You should revise the population of ....or you can rewrite your sentence "For instance, Sweden as developed country have invested the budget for education and health has low crime rate rather than Uganda as developing country, which has many population and has bad sanitation".

4. The country finance should be widely shared with the social issues, as ... You can use active voice to make it clear who is doing what.Use the passive voice when the sentence object is more important than the subject or you can rewrite you sentence with passive voice "The country budget should be widely used in social issues, education and hospital".


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