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The role of househusbands in the modern world - IELTS 2



emmaswann 1 / -  
Dec 22, 2024   #1
These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children while mothers go out to work. What could be the reasons for this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

In the modern world, more and more gentlemen show their preference on the role of househusbands, while their counterparts take care of financial aspects. My essay will shed light on several reasons on this phenomenon and how its adverse impacts on society.

There are an array of reasons why male and females exchange their roles. Firstly, the growth of technology has created more opportunities suitable for women. Therefore, they can earn more money than their partners which brings them to become breadwinners in their families. For instance, some careers such as teacher, saler or manager have better income for women because they require emotional intelligence more than physical strength. The second reason I should mention is that society has become more equal in terms of genders. These days, men can stay at home and have a hands-on approach to raising children without criticism from society in the past.

Consequently, this trend has several merits for both genders. The main effect is the efficiency of the tasks carried out by family members. More specifically, if one of the spouses can work better and earn more salary, the other can stay at home to take care of family and no longer be under pressure to sacrifice their careers. Additionally, switching roles lead to greater empathy, parents get a chance to encounter difficulties that their partners deal with every day, as a consequence, they will be more empathetic to their half.

In conclusion, the increasing of men assuming childcare duties due to the changing of modem relationships, which have opened up a better condition for women to engage in the workplace. COnsequently, this trend has led to several desirable results.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15512  
Dec 24, 2024   #2
gentlemen show their preference on the role of househusbands,

This is an incorrect statement that has no basis in the original topic presentation. This created a prompt deviation that alters the basis of the overall discussion in relation to the original topic. This alteration will cause massive task accuracy point deductions because the essay has veered away from the original discussion foundation. If this is a personal opinion of the writer, then it should have been used to open the writer's opinion section of the first paragraph instead.

My essay will shed light

Part of the TA scoring consideration is the writer's ability to respond in a quick format to the provided questions. A summary of the salient discussion points that the writer's body of reasons paragraphs will be based upon. Simply reiterating the discussion requirements will not gain points for the paragraph since it does not provide the clear supporting points the writer will use to emphasize his opinion as the correct one.

the increasing of men assuming childcare duties due to the changing of modem relationships, which have opened up a better condition for women to engage in the workplace.

This is a confusing statement that does not have any point. What is the actual result of this thought? There is none. So it does not make sense to the reader and will result in a failing GRA and C+C score.


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