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Essay about the role of parents and school in children education.

congviec18 1 / 3 1  
Jan 11, 2018   #1

key factors which affects children's development

Children education seems to be a concerning subject of all time but there is a controversial question of whether parents or schools must shoulder the ultimate responsibility for teaching kids to become good citizens. This essay will discuss both sides of the subject.

Many people may claim that parents are the main childcarers- the ones who a child lives under the same roof with, so they have a closeknit relationship with the kid. Parents are well aware of their child's strengths and weaknesses so that they might have appropriate adjusts to wrong deeds by them. This may create a good environment for the child to develop their mental as well as physical qualities, which, in turn, will become a firm foundation for their growth becoming good adults. On the contrary, other people believe that children go to school to study as well as learn to be well-behaved. Since their parents are too busy making money, kids spend most of their time at school with their teachers and friends who might have great influence on their behaviours. It is said that "like teacher, like student" so whether kids grow up to be good members or not depends much on their teachers' support and care at school. Also, school is like a small society where children meet and have contacts with other children having different personalities, coming from different family background. They make friends with each other and this has impact on their behaviour as well. Therefore, it is clear that schools play a key role in educating children.

To conclude, both parents and school are key factors which affects children's development. I express the opinion that the two sides share equal responsibility for bringing up kids to become good members of society.

Holt [Contributor] - / 7,665 2036  
Jan 11, 2018   #2
Mien, please provide the original prompt along with your essay response the next time you post an essay for review. That is the only way I can accurately help you in terms of essay responsiveness to the prompt and proper outlining of your responses. I am almost certain that this is not a "controversial" issue that is a "concerning subject of all time". I just can't explain to you where the error is, how it happened, and how it can be corrected because of the missing prompt.

Even without that prompt though, there is no way that this response will pass the test because only have 3 improperly formatted paragraphs presented in an essay that requires 5 paragraph, of 5 sentence each, in its formatting for the presentation of your answer / explanation based on the prompt requirement. I strongly advise you to review the other essays at this forum in order to get an idea as to how and why the proper formatting of the essay response, from the opening paraphrase, body of paragraphs, and the conclusion is of the utmost importance in order for you to get a decent score.

I cannot assist you to a greater extent at this moment because of the missing prompt. Unfortunately I can only give you one free advice per thread so I won't be able to assist you even if you post the prompt now. When you write another practice essay, don't forget to provide the original prompt along with it so that I can better assist you at that time.
OP congviec18 1 / 3 1  
Jan 12, 2018   #3
Thank you very much for your feedback. I appreciate it and take your advice seriously.

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