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[IELTS TASK 1] Personal savings in five countries


tiaDS 73 / 235 52  
Jun 29, 2014   #1
The table below shows personal savings as a percentage of personal income for selected countries in 1970, 1990 and 2000.

The table indicates how people in Canada, France, Germany, Italy, United Kingdom, America and Japan save their personal income from 1970 to 2000 and is measured in percentage.

Overall, it can be seen that the percentage of personal income declines in six countries in the timeframe, while the figure of Britons has the reverse pattern.

The largest percentage of personal income was recorded by Italians in 1970. Then followed by people in France, this figure for personal saving stood at 18.7%. In terms of personal income, Canada as the lowest percentage was 5.6% of all countries. Like France, this figure of personal saving in Italy, Japan, United Kingdom and America experienced a dramatic downward in 1990. However, the proportion of personal income in Canada inclined suddenly to 11.5 percent. Interestingly, the figure of personal saving in Germany remained reasonably stable at 13.8 per cent between 1970 and 1990.

Turning to the figure in 2000, Canadian held the lowest percentage of personal income in all countries. Standing in contrast, the figure of people in France and Japan who saved their money witnessed a slight increase from around 12.1% to 13.6% between 1990 and 2000, a rise of about 1.5 percent in a year. Following this, the percentage of personal income in Germany also saw a steady upward in the post of reunification.



hungtho 2 / 10  
Jul 2, 2014   #2
a steady upward

upward is an adjective.
So, in my opinion, you should change this sentence.
the percentage of personal saving in Germany also saw obviously in the post of reunification.
andial 21 / 48 3  
Jul 2, 2014   #3
I think you do not need to separete 2 sentences which can actually be combined in one. It is because the second clause

and is measured in percentage

is not as important and urgent as the first one

The table indicates how people in Canada, France, Germany, Italy, United Kingdom, America and Japan save their personal income from 1970 to 2000 and is measured in percentage

here is my suggestion

The table provides a breakdown of information concerning the percentage of 7 major countries around the globe saving their personal income between 1970 and 2000.
OP tiaDS 73 / 235 52  
Jul 3, 2014   #4
Hai guys thanks for your advice, I will pay attention as per your suggestions in the next essay.

is not as important and urgent as the first one

I just learnt this sentence which includes in a introduction paragraph from my latest lesson and I attempted to write in my intro.


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