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The sense of competition in children: co-operate rather than compete?


yas rose 2 / 11  
May 23, 2011   #1
TOPIC: Some people think that the sense of competition in children should be encouraged.Other believe that children who are taught to co-oprate rather than compete become more useful adult.

My essay

Today, the accurate education is considered as a crucial affair for having more productive adult .Regarding this , there are two different perspectives .Some people argue that children should be trained for co-operating in various communities while there are a number of people who believe that creating the sense of competition is a convenient solution .This essay reveals the fact that teaching the methods of contributing contains more advantages as a result.

It could be accepted that rivalry may bring about increasing the independency in each person or causes everyone to make progress personally ;however, there is a little evidence to support that .For instance ,although the feeling of achieving all honors individually may be pleasant for each person, the strong feeling of weakness in failures should not be neglected ; moreover ,competition usually is associated with the sense of envy leading to taking an immoral action against others such as ,dismissing someone from work.

Coop rating is one of the most prominent elements for living .I tend to think that children should be taught if they are to be part of society . statistics has illustrated that team-working has more positive aspects .such as diminishing the pressure especially in hard ships ,working eagerly and peacefully as well .Since they are informed they have direct influence on the other members of group ,so they assume their responsibilities much better .By this I mean to say that they are more helpful and hard working .According to some researches the rate of violence is lower among them and they are greatly happier .They have high self confidence in comparison with the other group who are on competition basis .

In the final analysis, I believe children become more capable when they are taught to co-operate rather than compete.
linmark 2 / 328 7  
May 23, 2011   #2
Please spellcheck the word "Cooperate" - which is consistently misspelled. It does not need to be hyphenated. Spaces go behind (.) periods, not before them.

Today, the accurate (DO YOU MEAN EFFECTIVE? WHAT IS AN ACCURATE EDUCATION?) education is considered as a crucial affair for having (CREATING???) more productive adult (ADULTS) .Regarding this , there are two different perspectives .Some people argue that children should be trained for co-operating in various communities while there are a number of people who believe that creating the sense of competition is a convenient solution .This essay reveals the fact that teaching the methods of contributing contains more advantages as a result.
OP yas rose 2 / 11  
May 24, 2011   #3
Dear A. Smith
I realy appreciate your feedback, also was the rest of the essay ok? if not what was the problem i thank you in advance for your help.

Regards,

Y. R.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
May 24, 2011   #4
Hi Rose, you are doing well! I am going to make small changes, but you MUST type each sentence 5 or 10 times so you will remember the correct grammar:

Today, high quality education is considered a crucial affair for ensuring a productive adult life.

This essay reveals the fact that teaching the methods of contributing and cooperating contains more advantages as a result.

It is reasonable to observe that rivalry may bring about increasing the independence in each person or cause everyone to make progress personally. However, there is a downside as well.

I like this sentence:
By this I mean to say that they are more helpful and hard working.---I like your way of thinking! :-)
OP yas rose 2 / 11  
May 25, 2011   #5
Than k you for your all attention.I realy appriciate that.I `m glad that i`ve joined at forum. I`m so motivated now to practice more.


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