Unanswered [6] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3


A separate room for nicotine users may limit the bad effect of the cigarette smoke on non-smokers


Riiskacha03 31 / 34 5  
Feb 21, 2016   #1
In some countries it is now illegal to smoke in public places. It is only fair that people who wish to smoke should have to leave the building. Do you agree or disagree?

Some countries have determined smoking in public areas as illegal and urge smokers to leave the area if they wish to smoke. While this is true to some extent, I also agree that construct certain smoking area in public place would be great to against the effect of smoking toward others who do not use it.

Some countries have decided smoking is forbidden in public area, even certain countries have been stated that it is not allowed inside the country. This prohibition based on the consciousness of smoking toward both the smoker and the people around them. Buthan, the country in the foot of Himalaya mountain restricts its citizens from growing, harvesting, producing and selling tobacco products activities throughout the Kingdom of Bhutan under the Tobacco Control Act of Bhutan, 2010.

In other countries which are allow the cigarette using, they put some limitation toward the users. There is a smoking area which is constructed in almost all of public infrastructure which facilitate the smokers and maintain other's pleasantness in the same place. The fact is, smoking area now have been settled as basic edifice which have to be constructed in public building as airports and hospitals in the countries around the world.

In conclusion, build a room for the smokers could limit the bad effect of the cigarette smoke toward those innocent people's lungs health. It is recommended that government take a long-term policy to reduce the using of cigarette which may lead to the improvement of the public's health.
nuni11 33 / 30 5  
Feb 21, 2016   #2
...if they wishwant (just an optional so that you do not use the same word from the question ) to smoke.

Some countries have decided smoking is forbidden in public area.
This has the same construct with the first sentence in your introduction. Here is my suggestion:
It is now regarded offense when people smoke in pubic places in many nations.

...the consciousness of smoking effects (...) tobacco products activities throughout the Kingdom of Bhutan

...which are allow the cigarette using
Wolf Larsen - / 127 47  
Feb 21, 2016   #3
Hello Riiskacha03
It appears that your text could have benefited from being stylistically refined a bit more. For example, the introductory sentence can be reformulated to sound as follows: It now became a common practice in many countries to designate special areas in public places, where people are allowed to smoke cigarettes. Moreover, even though your text does mention some issues, associated with the subject matter at stake, it does not make much of an argumentative point. This, in turn, makes the beginning of the concluding sentence ('In conclusion') rather uncalled for - you have not explored the controversial aspects of the discussed issue, in order for your conclusion to be fully substantiated. Again, this is just my opinion. I hope you will find it helpful. Regards.


Home / Writing Feedback / A separate room for nicotine users may limit the bad effect of the cigarette smoke on non-smokers
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳