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Sex education should be a compulsory part of the secondary curriculum


samuel11023 3 / 5  
Jul 9, 2011   #1
Nice to meet you all.The forum is a good platform for me to share my writing.I would like all of you can give me some feedback.

I'm very grateful if you give me some feedback.Thanks in advance ^^

Question
Some people suggest that sex education should be a compulsory part of the secondary curriculum.Write a two-sided argumentative esay expressing your veis on the subject.

In bygone days,many people regarded sex as a taboo suject and refrain from talking about it to teenagers.However,with the sexual problem seeing the red light in adolescent,the pendulum seems to have swung the other way .People are becoming more comfortable to talk sex now and suggest that sex education should be a compulsory part of the secondary curriculum .In this essay,I would like to examine the pros and cons about the suggestion.

With the news about young girls becoming unmarried mothers,teenagers perfroming one-night stands,people in their early teens being infected with AIDS,etc,it is imperative to put sex education into a compulsory part of the secondary curriculum.Our younger generation,is sexually-open yet sexually-ignorant,have to be instilled the appropriate value of sex into their mind.

Appropriate sex education in school has a great impact on preventing sexual problem in puberty.People in puberty,tend to be curious about the opposite sex,fall prey to sexually transmitted disease easily owing to their scant knowledge of sex.Take an example,it is not news to hear that the future of two teenagers is ruined by an unexpected child,after a wild night.Such a situation could have been avoided if the two had be introduced with a proper attitude towards sex.

Added to the above,sex education elements are covered to strengthen teenagers' understanding of sexuality issues,and enhance their ability to analyse and judge related personal and social issues with rational and responsible attitudes.Hence, teenagers can analyse what is wrong and what is right young people are able to communicate,listen,negotiate with others,ask for and identify sources of help and advice when it comes to sex relationship.

Now that we have looked at the pros of put sex education into a compulsory part of the secondary curriculum,which include preventing teenagers from enagaging in sex,helping teenagers to cultivate the clear understanding of right and wrong,I will examine the cons about this issues.

First of all,students may still suffer from embarrassment or get excitable by the topic matter. This can cause for out-of-control classrooms if students take to giggling or making inappropriate remarks.After that teachers are not always trained how to properly teach sex education courses and may transgress their own beliefs or morals into the subject matter rather than stick with the facts.In addition, sex education is often viewed as a "recreational" course and not a serious subject .This is a direct correlation to the fact that there are no grades or scores to be derived from class.

The issue of whether sex education should be a compulsory part of the secondary curriculum has both supporters and critics.As far as I am concerned,I would support it on the basis of the interests of teenagers.

dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Jul 9, 2011   #2
In bygone days,many people regarded sex as a taboo suject and refrain from talking about it towith their teenagers children. -------- I changed it slightly hoping to add more effect.

However,with the sexual problem seeing the red light in adolescent,the pendulum seems to have swung the other way .People are becoming more comfortable to talk about sex now and suggest that sex education should be made a compulsory part of the secondary curriculum .In this essay,I would like to examine the pros and cons about thethis suggestion. --------------------- Your intro is very impressive

With the news about young girls becoming unmarried mothers,teenagers perfroming one-night stands,people in their early teens being infected with AIDS,etc,it is imperative to put sex education into a compulsory part of the secondary curriculum.Our younger generation, which is sexually-open yet sexually-ignorant, haveneed to be instilledencouraged to understand and respect the appropriate value of sex into their mind .

Appropriate sex education in school has a great impact on preventing sexual problems in puberty.PeopleChildren in puberty, tend to be curious about the opposite sex,and prone to be victimsfall preyto of sexually transmitted diseases easily owingdue to their scantinadequate knowledge ofabout sex.

I enjoyed reading your essay. You have good ideas, a good flow and an interesting writing style.
OP samuel11023 3 / 5  
Jul 10, 2011   #3
Thanks your feedback.I would be grateful if you can rank this essay.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,335 129  
Jul 11, 2011   #4
Keep it in the past tense:
In bygone days, many people regarded sex as a taboo suject and refrained...

However,with the sexual problem seeing the red light is becoming more important among adolescents, so the pendulum seems to have swung the other way.

People are becoming more comfortable to talk sex talking about sex now and suggest that sex education should be a compulsory part of the secondary curriculum. In this essay, I would like to examine the pros and cons about the suggestion, and I will argue that ____________________ (State your argument).

With the news about young girls becoming unmarried mothers,teenagers perfroming indulging in one-night stands, people in their early teens being infected with AIDS, etc., it is imperative to put sex education into a compulsory part of the secondary curriculum.

****HIT THE SPACE BAR after ever period and comma.
Our younger generation, is ...

sexually-open yet sexually-ignorant---clever phrase!!

Do not say topic matter. Say SUBJECT MATTER.
First of all, students may still suffer from embarrassment or become excitable by the subject matter. This can cause for out-of-control classrooms if students take to giggling or making inappropriate remarks.---Yes! It is a hard class to teach!

This is a direct correlation to the fact that there are no grades or scores to be derived from class.---Well, I suppose that means they should be graded.

I think you should give a sentence to explain why the pros outweigh the cons. :-) This is great English writing!!
OP samuel11023 3 / 5  
Jul 11, 2011   #5
EF_Kevin:
you have a great English skill and i am grateful for your feedback!Thanks...I will strive for the best to improve my English~


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