Teaching small kids to be a valuable persons inside their society when they grow up is the main duty of both parents and schools simultaneously. At their earlier life in the home, children are learned by their parents how to eat and drink , how to dress, how to clean themselves and how to take care about themselves from some dangers like fire and electricity. Also, at this age group a lot of values and beliefs are taught to them like how to respect others, how to deal with deal with those who are older and younger in a way that doesn't hurt them. However, the role of home and parents in learning certain skills are lacking like learning the kids mathmatics and hence, the role of school now comes over.
Teaching children at schools should help growing up of the seed that have been seeded inside the kids in their early life by their parents at home. It's the schools' function to help children to pick up what's missed and can't be learned by their parents, hence, schools duties include teaching children how to make values for all things, teaching how to respect others and how to deal with them in a manner that doesn't hurt any. Also, it's the school duty to teach children the common traditions and beliefs that are valued by the society. In addition to that, schools should teach children different sciences like maths, geographics, history and different languages. Another task that is devoted to schools is to make children aware of the value of work and production and hence when the become older they can participate in the development of their countries.
To sum up, children teaching and education is a sharing task between both parents and schools.
I think you should pay more attention to the structure and organization of an essay. Start the essay with an introduction. Each introduction opens with a motivator. Then you should write the thesis statement and finally state you opinion. After writing the introduction write at least two paragraphs as the body. Through the body you should support your opinion. Each paragraph in the body has three main parts :Topic sentence+Supporting sentence + Concluding sentence (optional). Finally write a conclusion. In the conclusion you should restate the thesis statement first, then mention a clincher.
