Unanswered [4] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3

Single-gender profession brings more advantages owing to numerous differences in sexual physiques

linhluong158 2 / 2  
Nov 22, 2017   #1


Gender equality at work has attracted several controversies throughout the world. Some people argue that single-gender profession brings more advantages owing to numerous difference in sexual physiques. It appears clear to me that this practise should not be put into effect because of several reasons below.

First and foremost, occupational segretation has no leg to stand on in today's highly civilized world. With technological development, unlimited access to the knowledge needed for a job enables everyone, regardless of their gender, to the equal chance to get well-informed as well as widen their career path. In addition, work suitability can not be determined by genders. Personal knowledge and commitment should be prioritized when considering a candidate for a vacancy. The less passionate one is about the work, the less effective his work will be.

Another reason for opposing this practise is that it is likely to harm the economy. Obviously, restricting a gender from getting a particular job is unfair and can be a loss of talent. For example, beauticians are usually defined as a job exclusively for women. But recently, men made their debut in this on-the-rise field, with a large number of household names such as Jeffrey Star and Manuel. This is a concrete evidence that there should be no bounderies in the job market. Besides, civil war can also occur as people will stand up for their right. In response to inequality in workplace in America a few years ago, for instance, a number of talented workers quit their jobs, leading to procrastination and a billion-dollar loss for the country's economy.

In conclusion, every single person has the equal right to choose and embark on their career they love. If their job opportunity is restricted just because of their gene, it will raise severe objection among society and negative impacts on the economy are unavoidable.

P/S: I'm new to this forum so I don't know how to reply to your comments under my thread. And I'm still trying to figure it out haha. But anyway, thank all of you for your helpful advices. They help me a lot!!!

chinkybehl22 10 / 25 4  
Nov 22, 2017   #2
Please mention the exact topic to get an appropriate feedback.

Meanwhile, would like to highlight grammatical errors and sentence construction.

1st paragraph:
... owing to the numerous ...

2nd paragraph:
... occupational segretation segregation will have has no leg ...

3rd paragraph:
... for their rights
... inequality in the workplace ...
OP linhluong158 2 / 2  
Nov 23, 2017   #3
thank you so much!!! really appreciate your comment

Home / Writing Feedback / Single-gender profession brings more advantages owing to numerous differences in sexual physiques