Unanswered [31] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 4


'small hand with long tapering fingers' - essay


nathalierousse 1 / -  
Dec 27, 2011   #1
This is a description of my mother.

She is small and medium build, not more than six meters. She has an oval face with bright green eyes and a small mouth. She has a short wavy hair . She usually wear it loose.

Her face is wide at the cheekbones and her forehead high.. She had small hand with long tapering fingers.
She is quite beautiful, especially when she smiles.
She always says what she thinks, but sometimes she tends to be stubborn, she never admits her fault.
HopefulApplier 4 / 27  
Dec 27, 2011   #2
What is the point of this essay? Also your mother is obviously not more than six meters... please elaborate
mdubs777 4 / 8  
Dec 27, 2011   #3
Too much repetition of 'she'. Mesh all your sentences together to create stronger ones.
stellastella 18 / 25  
Dec 28, 2011   #4
Hi
First, there is no doubt that individuals are not more than six meters.
She is small and medium build, not more than six meters.--> she is fairly short.
Second, try to use some transition.
She has a short wavy hair , also She usually wear it loose.
Third, try to avoid repetition.
My mother is quite beautiful, especially when she smiles.
Also,She has small hands with long tapering fingers.

Best Wish.


Home / Writing Feedback / 'small hand with long tapering fingers' - essay
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳