Essay
It was december-a bright frozen day in the early morning. It was 10 in the morning
and I was still in my bed. You never want to leave your bed with it's warmth in
winters and with me was my Lethargy-my childhood friend. It was compelling me stay
in the bed but somehow I managed to fight it down and jumped off my bed rubbing the
sleep from my eyes. Like everyday I brushed, bathed, got ready and stood in front
of my mirror combing my hair. I stopped for a while and admired myself. I stood
there thinking to myself- Who I am? And my humour reminded me of an essay which I
wrote on myself as a pre-primary student. "I am Khan. I study in
eleventh standard in City montessori school. I have two brother and sisters." Being in a
philosophical mood I bridled my humorous thoughts and began to examine myself
closely. I am unique and I am a first-rate version of myself and no one can be like
me.It took nineteen years to create who I am today. Within these years, I have been
given the freedom to explore the world in order to satisfy my curiosity toward all
the strange and wonderful things in the world around me. And there, I was standind
like a stupid smiling at my own face.
I am an ambitious person. I have aspirations flying high to the zenith. I
want to be a world-class engineer, an Idol for others, an inspiration, a legend. In
a nutshell, I want to be "Great". But the problem with me is that I only have
mammoth desires but compared to them my efforts are close to nil. All credit goes
to Lethargy. To achieve my goal I need to take a path that suits me. It may be some
art, like music. I have a great interest in music and I like singing and playing
piano. I want to learn piano but going for piano classes after returning from my
school is really a big deal for me, I am so weary after the long day at school. So
many lectures, loads of work, scolding from teachers, makes me too tired to attend
any extra classes. And so I still have a desire, only a desire to learn piano. No
luck here. I always curse luck for my problems though I know it all depends on me,
how I construct it.
And so I need to find some other way to become "great"!! I love painting and
sketching. I mostly draw cartoons. So being a cartoonist would also be another
option to reach my goal. But I think, being a cartoonist will not give me the
recognition which I really. So even this will not work.
Now, the only alternative I am left with is going with another interest of
mine, computers. That's why I aspire to be an engineer, a software engineer. I have
an exceptional interest in computer science. I love programming and hope to create
something, some software, that goes world-wide and become a great sensation. To be
an engineer all I need is to concentrate in my studies and no need for any extra
classes and all that. But even in this case, I get bored sometimes. That's why I am
one of those students who study at the very last moment. My parents ask me why do I
study at the last moment, burning the midnight oil and waisting the fuel when I
have the sunlight throughout the day. My answer always remains: "That's how I am!!
I know I'll forget everything if I study beforehand."
My statement is true, indeed! Atleast for me. I know who I am and how I do
the things. I have my weaknesses, I know them. I am lazy, sometimes indisciplined
(some people may say I am always but that's there opinion), sometimes disobedient,
sometimes mean, a lot of times stingy, sometimes unpuntual and 'argumentative'. I
put 'argumentative' in inverted commas because this is the one thing for which I
have been scolded a thousand times from my teachers, my parens, almost all my
elders. I remember once being thrashed for arguying with a teacher. Bad memories,
horrible! And there maybe more elements in my list of vices which others would be
knowing because I never know what kind of behaviour is liked by someone whom I
don't know. Some of my habhits,my friends would like but some other people, they
would not like them. My persona also depends upon the point of view of the
people.Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions,
their lives a mimicry,their passions a quotation. But I don't want to belong to
their category, so giveway to their opinion and try to improve but still, I don't
get overwhelmed by what they say. Afterall, they should also learn something,
something like- "to accept the realtiy!" You cannot always make things go in your
way, how you want them! I am what I am, I can't change so much as to lose my real
self! It's better to be hated for what you are, than to be loved for what you are
not!!
I am a balanced person. I've plus points as well to counteract so many
negativitites. I am optimistic, thoughtful, frank, loyal, honest(sometimes not, but
mostly), cool-minded, religious(I am nothing without my God) , etc. etc. I am a
little emtional but I am not able to express myself most of the times.I really
don't think that anyone in this world knows the real me. My closest friends know me
better than anyone else, but I don't think I've ever let certain sides of me come
out around anyone except myself. I keep some feelings hidden because no one would
understand, and even if they did understand, there wouldn't be anything that anyone
could do to make the feelings disappear. I don't cry on mishaps though I feel bad
on the inside but I always try to hide things behind my smile. I am humorous. I
love humour. Humour is something that can change a sob into a laugh.Quoting
Mr.Henry Ward Beecher-"A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without
springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the road." But sometimes there are
situations in which humour is least effective, instead, it may hurt somebody.There
is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and
hurt. So humour is something to be 'handled with care'. And there are many things
about, that I still have to explore. Life is a process of self discovery. As life
goes we face new experiences, we are filled with new ideas, sometimes even our
attitude even changes. To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist,
that is all. I believing in living life kingsize and not just existing.
I am one only one of my kind. There's nobody like me in the whole galactic
system.I am Me. In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me. Everything
that comes out of me is authentically mine, because I alone chose it. I own
everything about me: my body, my feelings, my mouth, my voice, all my actions,
whether they be to others or myself. I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my
fears. I own my triumphs and successes, all my failures and mistakes. I have the
tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive, and to make sense and
order out of the world of people and things outside of me. I own me, and therefore,
I can engineer me. I may not be perfect and I know I'm not but whatever I am, I am
proud of it!!
And still I was standing there like a stupid smiling at my own face
forgetting that I'm already late for my school. I was late for my school and even
got scolding and was made to stand outside the principal's office. I was standing
there, merely a point on this earth but uncomparable to anybody else on this planet.
I am Khan.
I'll be highly obliged if you check this essay for some corrections as well as help out with improving the grammar. How to beautify my essay?! Please help me out as soon as possible...have to submit my assignment the day after!!
