this is the integrated task in kaplan, practice test 2, Please grade me and have some feedback. Thanks in advance
In this set of materials, the reading passage (RP) and the listening passage (LP) are about smoking band. While the author points out many disadvantages of smoking band, the speaker states that smoking is harmful and should be diminished.
First, according to the RP, it takes at least 20 years for direct smoker and more than life time for inhaling second smoke to develop lung cancer. Therefore, the number of victims who died for cancer is not so large. However, the speaker refutes by saying that smoking not also trigger lung cancer but also create many other fatal sickness such as heart disease.
Second, the author states that smoking band influences the freedom and economic position of business owners and their employees. In contrast to the author, according to the LP, despite the fact that a lot of bars, restaurants have to close because of smoking band, there will be many others open and thrive. Furthermore, the number of nonsmokers outweighs the number of smokers; therefore, those service places should apply smoking band for more profits.
Finally, the RP posits that smoking band triggers the erosion of personal freedoms, which may also affect the taxes of the governments. The speaker opposes this by saying that smoking ban actually gives the smokers freedoms to protect the environment, chances to give up smoking. Moreover, the LP also states that smoking makes people addict to it, which is not a freedom at all.
Your essay sounds well, it is good that you write about personal freedom. I think you just need a little more detailing in your examples, and it would be better if your examples would me more concrete. Goood luck
