Soccer players - IELTS WRITING TASK 1: Bar chart

The bar chart illustrates the percentage of males and females played 9 different sports in the UK in the year 2008.

Overall, the percentage of males playing soccer was the biggest while the opposite was true for netball. Whereas Netball was the most popular sport for females. In addition, the biggest difference was in the number of males and females playing netball.

As can be seen from the chart, the percentage of males choosing soccer was approximately 24% while that of females was relatively smaller (about 5%). Also, the figure for other sports among males was 20%, twice as many as that of females. Cricket accounted for 10% and 2% in the percentage of males and females playing sport respectively.

Looking at the chart for more detail, tennis and basketball had the percentage of males and females choosing to play quite equal, around 7%. The figure for Netball among females stood at 25% while that among males was only 1%. The second most popular sport for females was swimming (about 22%). The data of males choosing swimming was relatively smaller (about 14%). In addition, the percentage of males and females were 4% and 3% respectively for jogging.

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The summary overview has 2 problems:
- Lack of sports listing based on the image provided
- Lack of synonym usage for the reference to male and female

There is a questionable reference in your presentation as well. You claim that the chart shows the percentage. However, upon close scrutiny of the provided image, there is no reference to a percentage measurement? Did you just guess that? Do not make any guesses about information. Since this is a data report, it needs to be accurate to the letter. For this report, I will take your word for it and believe that you are referring to percentage measurements, just for the sake of argument.

Save for these observations, I would have to say that your report is accurate enough. It shows a proper range of GRA skills, but lacks in proper synonym usage and sentence structure. There are also situation where you should be using connecting words such as "the" but fail to do so. These are minimal errors that do not impede the understanding of your essay. While there will be some deductions for the sentence structure errors, it will not prevent your essay from achieving at least a passing score.