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Social media (Advantages and Disadvantages)

Yopi 1 / -  
Mar 3, 2019   #1


Social media is becoming increasingly popular amongst all age groups. However, sharing personal information on social media websites does have risks.
Do you think that the advantages of social media outweigh the disadvantages?

Social media has become a part and parcel of today's way of living. Social media is being used by not only by young people, but large portion of older generation are getting involved. However there are rising concerns that people's information is being misused by various individuals and organizations without their consent. This essay will first discuss the social media's benefits and then the disadvantage it brings to us, namely our information that is publicly available for others to misuse. I argue that, overall, social media brings more advantages than the disadvantages; however, we need to be educated how to protect our data.

Social media is one of the best by product of the internet. We can communicate with our all our friends and family instantaneously all around the global. We can share information with all of them, discuss our ideas and opinions while being thousands of miles apart from each other. Social media also has had helped people in time of emergencies and in need moral support. The Information we decide to post on our social media is critical for others to understand us better. Without it social media is meaningless; same as not talking would be for face-to-face interaction. For example, in the study of 20,000 users of Facebook around different countries, from the period 2010-2018, showed that people were more content and happy with their lives than those who didn't use social media at all.

However, using social media has caused profound concern for data misuse. When we use social media, our information is there for the public to see. Whatever we post, there is always a risk that people who don't like us, can use the information to hurt or humiliate us. Furthermore, the social media companies regularly share information with advertisers so that they can better understand our buying patterns, our beliefs, interests etc. and promote their products or services through advertisements on these social media platforms. In the report published by FBI in 2017, up to 90% of social media users' data had been shared with third parties advertising companies without their knowledge. The report also found that 80% of all homicides, the killers used social media of the victims for their acts.

In the end, I do believe that Social media brings more benefits compared to its negatives. The key is to post information which is not too personal and is only shared to close friends and family. Additionally, we can always implement strict privacy settings to our profiles, which will help prevent data misuse.

40 min essay, but I took 1 hour. I am practicing. I am improving my time management.

Can you mark me on

Task Achievement.
Coherence and Cohesion.
Lexical Resource (Vocabulary)
Grammatical Range and Accuracy.

In your opinion give me your IELTS band score out of 9.
Thank you.

Holt [Contributor] - / 7,857 2141  
Mar 4, 2019   #2
Zoheb, I am not going to mark you on any of the scoring bases because what you wrote is not a task 2 essay but a research paper. Which means this essay is automatically going to fail in an actual test setting. There is absolutely no way this kind of writing, though academic, will pass the test. You have written the essay without referring to any examples as to how you may approach the writing of this type of essay question, which is why you ended up making this fatal error in your writing style.

You wrote 422 words, even with a speed typist, this number of words will be too much for a 40 minute task. You should not write more than 25 lines of 300 words at the most. The essay obviously uses researched information rather than personal knowledge or experience. In which case you have not written an opinion paper but a research paper. Task 2 essays only require personal knowledge, reasoning, and opinions. You do not have access to internet sources at the testing center, regardless of whether you use the pen and paper or computer based test. This style of research dependent writing will result in the failure of your paper.

I cannot review the rest of your paper because you have not adhered to the basic test writing requirements which are:

1. A proper prompt paraphrase (restatement of the topic and discussion instruction)
2. Reasoning paragraphs based on personal knowledge and/or opinions
3. Concluding summary

It will be better if you first review the sample Task 2 essays located in this forum before you start writing another practice test. Don't review blindly. That is how you fail. Look at how others do the work, learn from their mistakes, apply it to your own work. It should not take you more than 10 minutes to outline the paper, take 20 minutes to draft, and 10 minutes to finalize the content. Do not, I repeat, do not do research. You cannot do that in the testing center.
buckmore - / 1  
Mar 6, 2019   #3
Zoheb, nice name, just a quick observation. On the third paragraph, second sentence, you doubled the "our". Doubling words is a common mistake people tend to make, so i suggest that you do a thorough read up of all your subsequent works before you do a final posting. But with that being said its an okay piece but good for a starter, with consistent practice and more research, i personally think your ideas will pop up better. thanks

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