Unanswered [8] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2

'someone you know that act with courage' - a journal topic about courage

Brianna_winter 1 / 1  
Oct 13, 2011   #1
this is the question my teacher gave me.

Is there someone you know that act with courage that is still alive now?
This is what i came up with:

My mother has always acted with courage weather it be mental or psychical. She never once showed weakness or so I thought a young age I never new how hard it was on my mom to stand up to her friends and tell them to "get out of the house" or "leave please your not doing me or my child any good". I never knew that tool a lot of courage to do that intill i had to be in the same room with her and her rude and arrogant friends that did not take her with a grain of salt and never helped my mother out at all. several year later she paid them no mind when they left us she seemed happier but, that was too last a short time I never once seen my mother cry much like she did when her friend insulted her and told her she was "worthless,and poor" witch hurt her but she never cried in front of her rude friends but she cried in front of me knowing that i would not open my mouth.

that is all i got for now i would like some help. It would be appreciated.
beepro21 15 / 22  
Oct 14, 2011   #2
To be honest, this is a not good writing. however , practice makes perfect so you should rewrite this writing and improve it.You should write more about how your mum overcame her difficulties and point out which action shows her courage most clearly.

Home / Writing Feedback / 'someone you know that act with courage' - a journal topic about courage