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The sophisticated of technology can bring several effects to human life


SarlindaDS_27 42 / 52 5  
Dec 2, 2016   #1
Modern technology is changing our world. This has advantages such as bringing people closer together through communication. It also has disadvantages such as destroying the differences between cultures.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?


It is the argued that the sophisticated of technology can bring several effects to human life. I strongly agree with the positive side of the technology that able to make the people become more intensive in communication with their relatives. Thus, I tend to disagree with the statement that the technology can be the issue of the various cultures damage. So, this essay will first present how the technology can make the people become more solid in their relationships and why it not totally harmful to the difference customs which followed by a reasonable conclusion.

Firstly, we have proven that today we are living in the technological era. We can reject that fact because of this day we are using the technology as much as our necessary, mainly in communication way. For instance, we use the smartphone to complete our demands to interaction with other people as the social creatures. According to the Global Technology Research of Kyoto University in 2013 has illustrated that the mankind over the world today had increased in gadget usage by 69% higher than in the one past decade. It has proven that globally we have depended on the one way of a communication method which is based on the technology.

Secondly, the negative side of technology is only happening if the people also have the intention to do the severe actions by it. Despite that, I believe that the technology can unfold the tolerance of humankind in this world based on the people diversity in their beliefs or cultures. It may be true there some issues about the racism problem through the technology usage, but the other facts which had proven the positives side of technology have to be our considerations. Furthermore, at present based on technological usage, the people have more time and flexibility space to be more know other cultures in this world.

To sum up, the pros and cons of the technological implementation absolutely must present. However, the advice and the wise perspective of the technological usage depend on its users, we cannot make a general judgment based only on some negatives issue. (351 words)

Dioba 68 / 104 7  
Dec 2, 2016   #2
Hi,there are several advice for you.

1. It is the argued that the sophisticated of technology ...
... positive side of the technology that able to make the people become ...

in my point of view, you put improper article "the" in your summary, remember several conditions you can use article "the"such as to represents superlative and to say something that people know what are you talking about because you mentioned the thing before or it's clear from the content.

2. I strongly agree with ... Thus, I tend to disagree with ...
in my point of view, merge both of those sentence and makes the overview more clear.

3. ... judgment based only on some negatives issue--- issues (plural/singular problem)

Keep writing!


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