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Space travel is important or not -----IELTS


Icecreamquest 6 / 15  
Sep 16, 2011   #1
Space travel to the moon is considered as "a step of mankind." But some people think that space travel has made little difference on people's lives today. To what extent do you agree or disagreeļ¼Ÿ

Presently there is a prevalent viewpoint that space traveling as a significant project costing the state considerable amount of resources every year, does not play a vital role in improvement for ordinary citizens' lives. Unfortunately I do not find my agreement in this regard.

First of all, one of the primary missions of exploring space is discovering various methods to enhance our living standard and help us coordinate our life, something which could not be achieved and implemented just on the earth. Without the work of artificial satellites in space, it can be assumed that weather forecast could not be played on TV every day as a kind of data support for residents to make their daily schedules; and we even could neither make purchase online instead of wasting time to go shopping outside nor communicate with others who are far from miles away through the Internet..

Further, exploration in space would also serve as a precious gift to our descendents. Landing the moon, in short term may be not an obvious practice, however, for our next generations in long run it would be an invaluable step since one day they could live or travel out of the earth developing new patterns of living. That does mean that in the future human beings are able to have much more choices to produce lots of opportunities for the development of mankind.

All in all, it is definitely imaginable that there might be a lot of different lives living in other planets or dozens of attractive stars extinct in the space. But as one of the space's members, we ---human yet acquaint little with our surroundings, thus travelling out of our own planet is not only conducive to ourselves, but also benefits human beings' future.


I've try to enrich my words, but this kind of topic is extremely unfamilar to me. So your revision will be absolutely appreciated and welcomed.

Thank you in advance.It should have been classified as "Writing feedback", but I made a mistake.

basawang 10 / 76  
Sep 16, 2011   #2
Hi,

It is a good essay.

I have one question.

That does mean that in the future human beings are able to have much more choices to produce lots of opportunities for the development of mankind.

I think this sentence is a little bit redundant.

If you delete the phrase "have much more choices to" or "much more choices to produce".

in either ways, is the meaning of this sentence changed?

Perhaps, you may also consider this modified version:
...in the future human beings are able to have more choices and opportunities for development.

By the way, since it is clear that the development you mention here is mankind's development, could the phrase "of mankind"
be removed?

Good luck
OP Icecreamquest 6 / 15  
Sep 16, 2011   #3
Thank you for your great advice. And I hope to make my essay more diversely with some wonderful words and expressions, but for this type of topic I realy find it difficult to do that.
trochanter 2 / 2  
Sep 20, 2011   #4
Hi,

in short term may be not an obvious practice,

"may be not" is incorrect usage.

it should be "may not be".

Good luck


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