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[IELTS - WRITING TASK 2] Spend money to construct new railway or to improve public transport


Bcnz 1 / -  
Aug 25, 2022   #1

discuss both views and give your opinion



Observation in both developed and developing nations finds controversy on the issue of how government should invest financial funds in national transportation. There is an increasingly popular opinion claiming that financial support should go for building new railways, facilitating quick trains between different cities. At the same time, other people hold that financial effort should be focused on enhancing the current transportation in public. I incline that both of the standpoints deserve recognition, as they are both logically sound arguments.

On the one hand, train in general, and fast train in specific, are becoming more and more crucial in today's society. In fact, modern people tend to commute from their home to the work office on a daily basis, and fast trains appear to be the most optimal choice for their moving pattern. For instance, it may take approximately 20 minutes to get to the desired destination, compares to 45 minutes if individuals choose public buses instead. Obviously, taking a fast train would be more beneficial in today's lifestyle, especially in densely populated cities with heavy traffic congestion. For this reason, investing a greater amount of money should be prudently considered and carefully applied to big cities.

On the other hand, public transport such as buses is commonly advocated to be the topmost solution for reducing carbon dioxide emissions within the atmosphere. Indeed, upgrading public transport would encourage more people to use it, as well as abolish the number of vehicles on the street during rush hours. For example, in rural areas where the existence of public buses is limited, residents are suffering difficulties when moving from their place to other areas. Clearly, enhancing the current state of public transport in the countryside and rural areas would benefit the vast majority in the long run, especially in developing nations with a limited provision in terms of public transportation.

To be conclusive, greater investment in terms of railways for fast trains is worth applying in densely populated cities, where citizens possess a high demand for commuting. Simultaneously, investment goes for upgrading current public transportation should be considered in rural areas, whose citizens are facing barriers when transporting between places.



Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,835 4783  
Aug 26, 2022   #2
358 words shows a lack of writing quality and incorrect task focus on the part of the exam taker. He is clearly influenced by the IELTS school of thought that subscribes to the idea that one will pass the test as long as he keeps on writing till the time runs out. This is the incorrect approach to responding to the task because such essays are more prone to C + C and GRA errors, as can be seen in this presentation.

The prompt restatement and writers opinion paragraph alone already shows how the exam taker mishandled the writing task. He over extended the topic presentation and bordered on altering the presentation. In fact, his discussion presentation no longer followed the required comparative discussion between the public support for opinions and how he news it. The lack of 2 opinion analysis points per paragraph is a better scoring option when compared to only presenting the writer's opinion throughout.

By constantly using commas to separate his sentence ideas, it is obvious that the writer can only write run on sentences. There are no real semple, complex, and compound sentence presentations. This is definitely a GRA problem. The writer can write long essays but is not capable of writing a proper essay that meets scoring requirements.


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