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'sportsmen are the ambassadors of a country' - IELTS essay

farina 11 / 25  
Jan 5, 2012   #1
Topic; Professional sportsmen should be paid a great deal of money. Some people feel it justified while others believe that is unjust to other professionals. Give your opinion.

In every corner of the world, sports industry is gaining immense popularity. Every individual has predilection for a certain sport. People gather from different areas to watch their favourites playing in the field. Who bring glory and rejoice to the people back at home. On this account it is considered, by some, that sportsmen should be highly paid. However, others refute this opinion and consider that every profession should be paid equally.

Cited by few people, sportsmen are the ambassadors of a country. They work done to dusk , epitomes of sporting profession, sacrifice their personal lives and dexterously avert the feelings of detest and rage, in people from countries which are suffering from internal war, into unity. Like in many African countries, in Somalia where groups of rebellions involved in terrorism, but when football world cup comes, every house in the country, on the face of every child you can see their national flag. Supporting their heroes vehemently, who represent their country in the world.

Similarly, actors and actress with their dandified affectations also earn equally great amount of money, but the essence of their work is not enough to fulfil the same duties as fulfilled by the sportsmen. For this reason they should be bestowed with large amount of money.

However, critics argue that other professionals like doctors, teachers, engineers, and policemen are the most important and vital pillars of a strong society, without each one of them a country will regress to an insufferable condition. There will be no law and order, people will cry for justice, upheaval of poverty, many prevalent diseases and no sign of development. Not only that, doctors work day and night to provide good health facilities and teachers provide literate citizens who can compete internationally to make their country economically stronger. A country can run without sportsmen but it will fall to the brink of destruction without illustrious professionals like teachers.

In conclusion, I concede that sports professionals are diligent and I esteem their efforts but it is unjust to pay them ample amount of money as compared to the other professions.

lenaincanada 1 / 2  
Jan 5, 2012   #2
Hi. l find the idea in this Essay is quite confuse, l am not really understanding your 2nd and 3rd para. however l think it is better to wirte an essay for ielts in 4 para.1 introduce para, 2 developed para, 1 conclusion para.

l assert that you could use the example such as atelth had a short career while other career like teachers. they could teach in their whole life, in another case, atelth is easy to get physical damage in sport. for example, david beckham. he broken his leg serveal times, when it comes to serious, their career is easy to end up.

at the same time, there has so many sport fans in the world. merchanise make money though this, for instance tv station. when world cup comes they earn so many money in transfer the picture to all over the world. in this way an athele should receive a higher salary.

however those are my suggestion.
l think you writting is pretty good, but organization needs to improve.
hope it help you..
anyway, l am prepared for my ielts test right now which is frustrate ....

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