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IELTS: spread of multinational companies is good or bad? Good


soso12_34 1 / 3  
Mar 16, 2013   #1
The spread of multinational companies and the resulting increase of globalization produce positive effects to everyone. Do you agree or disagree?

Globalization is the process of increasing connectivity and independence of the world's markets and businesses. many people believe that globalization is the result of spread of multinational companies have a positive effects to everyone. I totally agree with them.

First, the spread of multinational companies will led the companies to improve their product in different point due to the customer culture .for example, if there is a food company which sell snack, if this company have multinational employee as China, India and from America. this cooperation of many people from different countries will led to a tasty snack which is accepted by almost all the nations. On the other hand, let us suppose that this company have only an Indian employee, imagine what kind of snack the will produce. is it a kary? is the taste of this product will be acceptable by Chines or Korean? the answer of this question without doubt led us to the second point which is that a uni-national companies usually have less profit than multinational one.

littlekid 986 7 / 16  
Mar 16, 2013   #2
Globalization is the process of increasing connectivity and independence of the world's markets and businesses. many people believe that globalization is the result of spread of multinational companies whichhas a positive effects to everyone. I totally agree with them.

I think you first sentence is too long ,and it sound ambiguous. Except a few grammer mistake , i think it should be better if youcan simplify the sentence and make a new clear express.Of course , this is only my opinion.
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Mar 16, 2013   #3
Well.... is this your full essay? If so, this is not sufficient for this task. You need to write at least 250 words and also your essay should contain a few important features; Introduction, 2 body paras and the conclusion.

Your introduction and first body para look ok. But where's the rest?

First, the spread of multinational companies willledlead the companies to improve their products in different point due to the customer culture

First, the spread of multinational companies result in introducing new products that suite respective cultures.
OP soso12_34 1 / 3  
Mar 17, 2013   #4
thank you very much all for your feedback.

dumi I know that it's less than 250 word but i was try to practice in time. i don't know should i consider the time while i am practicing for the IELTS. or i just have to lean how to write a good paragraph without considering the time.

i rewrite the paragraph with 250 word put without considering the time can you please correct it and if there is a week sentence. how can i rephrase it to make it strong.

The spread of multinational companies and the resulting increase of globalization produce positive effects to everyone. Do you agree or disagree?

Globalization is the integration of economics and societies all over the world. many people believe that the spread of multinational companies which is the result of globalization can produce a positive effect to everyone. However, there are some people how believes that the spread of these multinational companies will cause a negative impact on the country.In my opinion, I totally agree that the separate of multinational companies will be beneficial for everyone.

To begin with, the spread of multinational companies result in introducing new products that suite respective cultures.for example, if there is a food company which sell snack, if this company have multinational employee as China, India and from America. this cooperation of many people from different counties will produce a tasty snack which is accepted by almost all the nations. On the other hand, let us suppose that this company have only an Indian employee, imagine what kind of snack the will produce. is it a kary? is the taste of this product will be acceptable by Chines or Korean?

Moreover, the spread of multinational companies will reduce the cost as a result it will increase the profit. An instance, many Europe companies built their factory in India and China because the employee cost are more less so they can get more profit.

In addition, the spread of multinational companies will improve the economic of the country. lets take India as example, remember the economic of it before many year and compare it with toddy after building many foreign companies. the compassion with out doubt will give as a clear vision about the importance of the multinational companies.

In conclusion, As I believe that spread of multinational companies will improve the economic I strongly believe that it's produce positive effects to everyone.
nothingto 3 / 4  
Mar 17, 2013   #5
Hmm, for strong essays, I wouldn't really state "In conclusion". Just take it out, and it works fine.
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Mar 18, 2013   #6
Yes... it's a very good approach to practice with time. Never mind even if you are a little short of words when you practice. You will improve. Always try to have the main structure in place. Get help from the topic title for the first sentence of your introduction which introduces the topic to your reader. Then write your opinion. Follow one standard way for all your essays so that it'll help you with typing speed too. For example - In my view, I believe that ?????? ( Try to have longer phrases so that they would help you with word count) Use the same phrase for all your essays...( this is just a hint for you to manage time)

Then you need to have at least two body paras. Quickly type down the first reason in the first body para. If you've got a specific example present it briefly. (don't waste time improving it or writing at length)

Go to the next body para and do the same.
Then have your conclusion (here too you can follow some standard method)
When you have time left go back to your first body para and expand it. Then attend to the second body para.
This way, you can score marks even if you couldn't finish it the way you really expected, because you have all essential features in your essay.

Practice would help you improve a lot with time management. Do practice with time. You can post your essays here for fine tuning :D


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