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Start to develop the electric cars or solve the problem of transportation system?


Imaduddinnst 3 / 2  
Feb 9, 2015   #1
The proliferation of private cars on the roads in many parts of the world has led to serious problems of pollution and may contribute to global warming. Some people think that governments should spend money for the development of public transportation systems in order to help alleviate this problem. Others think it is better to spend money for the development of electric and other types of cars that may cause less pollution.

Do you think it is better for governments to spend money developing public transportation or developing new kinds of cars? Why or why not? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The serious air pollution problem caused by gas emission of nonpublic transportation in the whole world becomes the main factors of the global warming issue. Many people utterly recommend that the governments should take some actions like budgeting much money for the development of electrical cars which give few impacts of air pollution problem while others personally believe that to tackle this problem can be done by the governments who resolve the problem of public transportation systems. I would argue that in reducing global warming effects, solving the problem of transportation system is better than developing the electrical cars.

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mumtazdinar 12 / 15 12  
Feb 9, 2015   #2
Hi Imaduddinnst,

These are several suggestions to improve your writing:

The serious air pollution problem caused by gas emission

Passive: The serious air pollution problem is caused by gas emission

air pollution problem while others personally believe

Put a comma before while: S+V, while S+V --->> air pollution problem, while other personally believe

educational sectors

education sectors

that more much money for the development of public transportation gives many positive effects than money for the production of electrical cars does.

that spend much money to develop public transport gives many positive effects instead of produce the electrical cars .

Good Luck !!!
TJLuschen - / 241 203  
Feb 9, 2015   #3
Hi, I thought your writing was pretty good, but your essay was not that convincing to me. I would have appreciated some detailed examples to illustrate and strengthen your arguments.

In my opinion, though the electric cars will not harm [increase] the air pollution, producing electrical cars will cause other problems, especially in funding problem,{this sounds odd - "funding" implies a government expenditure - but it sounds like you are talking about people being able to afford them} because it needs more much money than usual.{than the usual what? regular cars? public transportation? a bit vague to me} Firstly, if the governments want to produce electrical cars, they should think about its fuel as the electrical fuel {"fuel" doesn't really work here, as it needs electricity, not fuel, though I suppose the power plant generating the electricity may need fuel} is so expensive for some people and nowadays there are a few {make sure to understand the difference between "few" and "a few"} electrical fuel stations. Moreover, due to this electrical cars production, the governments have to cut much money which has been allocated to other sectors. {is this happening now, or a hypothetical? If a hypothetical, say "would have to cut"} Thus, it will decrease services of [in] other sectors such as health and educational sectors . {this paragraph was not that convincing to me - it sounds like the prompt is implying there is a certain amount of money, which can be spent either on developing electric cars or improving public transportation. The expense to the government will be the same in either case}

On the other hand, it seems to me that much money given{"spent" is better} by the governments will make excellent public transportation because they can repair the broken cars [trains] or buses and probably buy the newest public transportation. First of all, the repaired or newest vehicles will be usually used by many passengers since they [will] feel [more] comfortable in using public transportation. {try to give an example of this to make it more convincing} In addition, since there are [would be] many people utilizing those vehicles, not only [would] the number of private cars on the road is decreased gradually, but also the effect of global warming c[ould] be reduced steadily.

To conclude, it is clear to me that more much money [spent] for the development of public transportation gives m[ore] positive effects than money for the production of electrical cars does. I think that the governments should be fully prepared if they want to produce electrical cars in big scale. {maybe it is a cultural thing, but I did not read the prompt as the government actually producing the cars, but investing in basic research, like batteries, and maybe subsidizing charging stations and giving tax incentives to electric car purchasers}


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