Unanswered [8] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 6

Staying in one location has benefits, but it will not outshine the merits of living in many areas


IqbalThemi 44 / 46 13  
Apr 7, 2015   #1
In the past, people usually stayed in one place throughout their life. These days, people often move around. They often live in several different places in their lifetime. What are the advantages and disadvantages of both?

Living in the same place in lifetime encourages people to have close relationship to their families and friends as every time they always interact and recognize by each others, although they also would feel bored easily. On the other hand, people today prefer staying in different location. As such, earning a lot of money could be one of benefits for them, whilst the advantage is less opportunity to take job. Therefore, I would argue that even though living in one location gives benefit, it will not outshine the advantages of being nomadic people.

The first advantage of people in permanent residence is having a real community spirit. For instance, people often do shared working to finish their activity around them. As a result, this condition stimulates people to care about their neighborhoods. However, without experiencing any changes in condition and situation in a place to live, people tend to the same job regularly. Consequently, lots of people cannot enjoy staying in their environment.

In contrast, for taking big salaries, people now are more mobile. They are very fond of moving one location to others. Although this trend causes some people lost work in old place and there is no guarantee for them to get a better career in their new are, people not having a fixed pattern of residences believe that they are really confident to have much more money that people in the past.

To sum up, the aforementioned evidence reveals that while the merit of common areas insures people quiet live, moving to other locations offer people new challenge and experience. Where possible, I would personally argue that having many domicile will make people to take more settle live than before.

BambusaMX 2 / 3 1  
Apr 7, 2015   #2
Haii Iqbal Themi,
i suppose you should change : knoweveryone with everyone else, = recognize each other.

and i would like to suggest you to enlarge your ideas and words untill 250 words.
OP IqbalThemi 44 / 46 13  
Apr 7, 2015   #3
Thanks bambusam for your correct and suggest. I have lots of tasks for making introduction today. Perhaps tomorrow you can completely read my writing again... I would like to hope that you want to correct my essay tomorrow.
Stacy Handayani 29 / 16 19  
Apr 8, 2015   #4
Hello Mr. Iqbal ! your writing is excellent. However I want to add some correction.

Living in the same place in lifetime encourages people to have close relationship to their families and friends as every time they always interact and recognize by each others, although they also would feel bored easily.

... As a result, this condition stimulates people to care about their neighborhoods .(or you can change it into "neighbours") However, without experiencing any changes in condition and situation in a place to live, people tend to do the same job regularly. Consequently, lots of people cannot enjoy staying in their environment.

In contrast, for taking big salaries, people now are more mobile. They are very fond of moving from one location to others. Although this trend causes some people lost their work in old place and there is no guarantee for them to get a better career in their new area , people not having a fixed pattern of residences believe that they are really confident towill have much more money thatthan people in the past.
OP IqbalThemi 44 / 46 13  
Apr 8, 2015   #5
Oke, thanks you tut wury handayani, it helps so much...
mohjawahir 11 / 17  
Apr 8, 2015   #6
Therefore, I would argue that even though living in one location gives benefitbenefits , it will not outshine the advantages of being nomadic people.


Home / Writing Feedback / Staying in one location has benefits, but it will not outshine the merits of living in many areas