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IELTS: The steep price of petrol is not the best solution for growing traffic

AlexisHuang 1 / 1  
Jan 18, 2012   #1
Need your help desperately!!!!!!! I wanna appreciate the comments you give to me!!!!!!! THANK YOU!!!!

The rising price tag on fuel has been frequently being on front pages in numerous different newspapers, which triggers fierce debate among the causes of it. One of the major reasons of it is that authority claims the way is effective to clear up the increasingly worse traffic and environmental problems. As far as I am concern, the steep price is not the best resolution.

Admittedly, shooting up oil cost is a direct channel to control the consumption of it, which could make further efforts to decrease the number of cars as well as the discharge of toxic gases. Nevertheless, it is only a temporary cure for this lingering illness. As the rapid development of economy and living standards, it is irresponsible to deny to convenience of vehicles and suppress the considerable demand of petrol. Moreover, the heavy charge could cause oil panic and damage social stability. Therefore, no wonder more fundamental approaches are needed to solve the trouble.

Given the severe difficulty, there are several methods to cope with it. First, the government should exert all strength to promote the construction of public transposition, to publish reward policy to encourage people to use it. Furthermore, depending on the improving high-tech, it provides an opportunity for us to harness green, powerful resources to replace gasoline, including solar energy, natural gases, nuclear power as well. Additionally, it is attitudes that play an indispensable role in our behaviors. Building up common perception that the utilization of civil communications is essential way to avoid endless traffic jam and protect environment.

Picturing the bitter and interminable complains about petrol price; conceiving the anxiety and anger when you are caught in blocking; it is obvious that the soaring cost not the useful mean to settle the dispute. Consequently, it is not only the problems but also those mentioned procedures should be put under spotlight.

ajit88rai 22 / 188 3  
Jan 18, 2012   #2
Hey buddy,
1. Write minimum 5 paragraphs for a good essay structuring. Google the Five paragraph approach.

2. You should write the points for and against any topic first and then write the essay. This will give you more variety in the essay.

3.For example, you have forgotten one very important aspect of the increased fuel prices. When the fuel prices increase, the transportation cost of almost all commodities increases ( as we know most tankers, trucks etc run on these fuels only ). This will result in escalating of the prices of normal essential commodities for the basic customers and thus raise the inflation rate..

4. The government needs to phase out the privately owned vehicles running on petrol/diesel etc and also the public transports. Only these transportation vehicles should be allowed to use these pollution causing fuels and rest all should be slowly and effectively phased out .

I hope this helps.
Gud luck and cheers.
OP AlexisHuang 1 / 1  
Jan 18, 2012   #3
I really appreciate your comments, and thank you so much for your help.
by the way, do you think my introduction part is too indirect? and could you give me some more advice about that part?
i'm very confused about that.
basawang 10 / 76  
Jan 20, 2012   #4
I guess your idea is as follows:

Although high oil price can reduce traffic loads and pollution, due to certain disadvantages, we should apply other methods to mitigate traffic and environment problems.

If this is true, you should put more emphasis on the disadvantages. I do not fully understand the drawbacks of high prices based on your essay.

Good luck

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