The increasingly high rates of juvenile delinquency areis a greatcrucial problem in the modern society
I would explore the reasons of suchthe issue
The introduction is too short, elaborate on it and make it more interesting.A recent study showeds
Add more details to this to make it more believable. For example:" A recent study, which was conducted in the US in 2009, revealed ...".
more likely to
u used this in the previous sentence. Avoid any repetitions.
those growing up under the control of theirwith parents
A longer term study carried out by University of Michigan over a decade, in 1960's, showeds
and a real crime
experts have
I prefer the word "pundits"
experts have followed ("investigated" is a better word in this context) 856 third grade
youth who watched the crimes shown on TVtelevision crime
more likely to
Repetition
educatingeducation is more
proper instruction is the most crucial factor to let them realize their mistakes and establish the thought that how important to live a prudent life is
If you add an example here, you can make your idea more apparent.
some fundamental skills such as ...
What types of skills? Write your idea clearly.
in order to live in the future
In a nutshell
it would be better to avoid using this since it is an informal phrase.
juvenile delinquency
Repetition
Regards
Ahmad