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'more than just strict punishment' - causes and punishment of teenager delinquency


zhoujingya 1 / -  
Aug 16, 2012   #1
The increasingly high rates of juvenile delinquency are a great problem in modern society. In this essay, I would explore the reasons of such issue and provide relative solutions.

When it comes to teenager delinquency, one's family is first to blame. Due to unceasingly aggravated living pressure, parents, nowadays, take less care to their children, thus rendering a child more likely to feel isolated and even becoming hostile and cynical towards the society. A recent study shows that youngsters lack of proper parental care are twice more likely to commit a crime than those growing up with parents. In addition, the proliferation of mass media should also be taken into consideration. Lured by profits, increasing number of publishers are inclined to add obscene and violence to their publications, a development dangerous to children. A longer term study carried by University of Michigan in 1960's shows that there is a possible link between crime images in the media and real crime. During the research, experts have followed 856 third grade children for 22 years, and concluded that the youth who watched television crime were more likely to commit crimes as teenagers and adults.

Although offenders should be condemned rather than condoned, people still need to consider prudently when deciding to punish teenagers. Personally, educating is more efficient and effective than physical punishment like imprison. Lack of mature life value, most young fellows make mistakes because they are mislead and lured by others; therefore, proper instruction is the most crucial factor to let them realize their mistakes and establish the thought that how important to live a prudent life is.What is more, educating and teaching some fundamental skills could assist young criminals to learn ample feats in order to live in future and , to some extent, avoid reconviction. As we all know, thousands of young culprits who have been isolated from society for a long time find themselves out of society and could hardly find a job to make a living, a situation that may render the youths to become recidivist. .In light of these factors, education is an integrated part of teenager's punishment, for it will assist young criminals to learn ample feats that they could rely on to mak a living.

In a nutshell, although the higher rate of juvenile delinquency is pressing, there is still solutions to deal with it. Nevertheless, coping with juvenile delinquency needs more than just strict punishment, as a saying goes, teaching the mind without teaching the heart is no education. To educate these teenagers there is still a long way to go.

ah_zafari [Contributor] 40 / 672 148  
Aug 16, 2012   #2
The increasingly high rates of juvenile delinquency areis a greatcrucial problem in the modern society

I would explore the reasons of suchthe issue

The introduction is too short, elaborate on it and make it more interesting.

A recent study showeds

Add more details to this to make it more believable. For example:" A recent study, which was conducted in the US in 2009, revealed ...".

more likely to

u used this in the previous sentence. Avoid any repetitions.

those growing up under the control of theirwith parents

A longer term study carried out by University of Michigan over a decade, in 1960's, showeds

and a real crime

experts have

I prefer the word "pundits"

experts have followed ("investigated" is a better word in this context) 856 third grade

youth who watched the crimes shown on TVtelevision crime

more likely to

Repetition

educatingeducation is more

proper instruction is the most crucial factor to let them realize their mistakes and establish the thought that how important to live a prudent life is

If you add an example here, you can make your idea more apparent.

some fundamental skills such as ...

What types of skills? Write your idea clearly.

in order to live in the future

In a nutshell

it would be better to avoid using this since it is an informal phrase.

juvenile delinquency

Repetition

Regards
Ahmad


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