('my strong curiosity in computer..') - pragraph more beautiful and functional?

Later, my strong curiosity in computer and its attractive "world" was caused a leisure activity to become my lifelong ambition by one of my teachers at the school. As a teacher, Mr. Farxod took me into the real world of computers: showed me the power and the major role of computers in all fields of life.

do mind map....its easy to elaborate your point...

please can u make it more functional? thank u in advance!!

I am applying for admission to the Bachelor Degree program in Information Technology (IT) for further advanced education to achieve my goals. I believe that my ambitions in computer science will contribute to expansion of software industry, development of wireless network access and information appliances. Indeed, I am more interested in the manner, in which huge INTERNET security problems are uncovered and fixed, and the possible ways that people in rural areas can have wide wireless internet access. Besides, we know that the latest paraphernalia features a long list of technological innovations: electronic chips, movement sensors and biometric recognition. So, I would also like to learn how exactly these devices that can monitor our smallest deeds and gestures work. In order to gain an appreciation of these and related issues, it is essential for me to have strong grounding in IT.

Hi , i think you are writing a statment of purpose to get an admission.
SOP should represnt about you. it you, who have to put about yourself, what you are, your aspirations, your thinking etc.
try to elaborate the things and write an essay . then do the corrections so that ideas keep comming to you.

Please dont' take my words in wrong perception.