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Many students choose to attend schools or universities outside their home countries. toefl


hakuyo1112 6 / 9  
Mar 20, 2014   #1
Hello! I wrote this essay in 20 minutes in order to master writing essays quickly. Thanks for your feedback.

Many students choose to attend schools or universities outside their home countries. Why do some students study abroad?

Today we live in a globalized era where the number of students studying abroad is increasing rapidly over the last course of years. There are numerous reasons why students chose to study abroad instead of pursuing education in their home country. Learning a new language, experiencing different culture and pursuing higher education are the most fundamental reasons of studying abroad.

It is without a doubt that students who study abroad are in advantage of mastering a new language, which would be extremely useful for their future profession. For most new language learners, it is overwhelming and hard to learn a language in their home country without interacting with native speakers. For pragmatic instance, my fellow friends tend to go to English speaking countries in order to master fluent English pronunciation and comprehension skills.

Other than learning a new language, studying abroad enables students to gain higher education system offered especially by developed countries. For example, the education system offered by my native country Mongolia is not sufficient and educational enough in most career majors. Therefore, a number of students in Mongolia tend to pursue majors offered by highly developed countries like USA and England. As a result, students are able to pursue more specialized and sophisticated careers by attending universities abroad as well as securing a stable future.

Another important reason for studying abroad is the experience of cultural diversity. While studying hard in a foreign country, students can travel around breath-taking new places and explore different aspects of the new country. In addition, they can meet and interact with new friends while perceiving different angle and sharing thoughts.

Taking account of all these factors, we can infer that studying abroad has many benefits that urge students to pursue a career in a new country. Students can augment their education as well as having fun exploring the new place. Who would not want to miss such a great opportunity!

heram 1 / 2  
Mar 20, 2014   #2
Hi hakuyo, I am practicing my writing skills for toefl too and I like your diction chosen and also your structure. It looks proffesional and helps me to enhance my vocab too. anyway, Good luck for your test :)
dumi 1 / 6,948 1592  
Mar 21, 2014   #3
For most new language learners, it is overwhelming and hard to learn a language in their home country without interacting with native speakers.

... this sentence needs better presentation. It doesn't flow well :(

Other than learning a new language, studying abroad enables students to gain higher education system offered especially by developed countries.

Other than learning a new language, studying abroad would enable students to gain more advance academic exposure.
Overall, a very good essay. You have very good writing skills. Wish you good luck with TOEFL! :)


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