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What students with no full-time jobs did after finishing their courses in 2008 in the UK - IELTS 1

nhungnp810 1 / -  
Jul 15, 2021   #1

Bar charts about employment in the UK

The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaveing college in 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts above give a brief statistical view of what graduate and postgraduate students with no full-time jobs did after finishing their courses in college in 2008 in the UK.

As can clearly be seen from the charts, the destination that most of these students landed on was further study, which nearly 30000 graduates chose to do and almost 3000 postgraduates did. Following right behind further study, part-time work was the second most chosen option by the UK seniors and post seniors, with approximately 18000 and 2500 students respectively. The number of uunemployed ones was fairly high among the graduates, which was 16235 students, closely equal to ones that took on part-time jobs. Meanwhile, this unfortunate option among postgraduates was quite low compared to the figure of those who chose to do part-time work and further study, around 1600 students. Predictably, the one which most students would not choose to do was voluntary work. Only 3500 graduates and 345 postgraduates did it.

To sum this up, the UK graduates and postgraduates are mostly out of full-time workforce due to further study, which will benefit the workforce after they are done with their studies. Meanwhile, even though the number of unemployed students was quite high, the ones that chose to do voluntary work were not that much.

213 words

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 12,857 4179  
Jul 15, 2021   #2
The writer must be made aware that he has overwritten his task report. The task 1 essay requires only between 175-200 words. He has written enough words for an almost complete task 2 essay instead. As the task 1 essay allows for a mere 20 minutes of writing time, the task must be completed with lesser words but with ample information clarity.

The writer must also identify the type of chart and number of charts provided. There is a lack of image differentiation which confuses the reader. Each chart provides a specific information type, which is normally used to identify the paragraph report focus. Each paragraph should be within a 5 sentence presentation only. The 2 images provided indicates that this is a 4 paragraph analytical report presentation. The writer should not compress differing information within a single paragraph. That type of format makes it difficult to keep track of.

The writer is offering a concluding statement towards the end. A presentation that is reserved and required only for task 2 essays. Rather than a summation , this task requires a trending statement instead. It is that statement which is missing in this report presentation.

The writer certainly has the potential to score well in this task exam. More formatting familiarity can assist him in achieving more than just a passing score.

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