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IELTS: Why students should have laptop in their learning process? Wikipedia, Google, Bing


Sigit_EngLearn 2 / 6  
Mar 29, 2014   #1
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Laptop is a thing that is the most necessary for students to help their learning process. Use specific reasons and example to support your answer.

Most of students think that laptop is the first thing that should they have to help their learning process at formal educations or non-formal educations. They should have a laptop even they live in cloistered villages if they take on learning process, but not all of do them have enough financial to buy it. So, how they can be finishing their duty if to finish it needs laptop? Well, if they do not have laptop to be finishing their duty needs laptop they can go to warnet or they can borrow it with their friends.

First of all, laptop can make easy students to get information, theory, knowledge, sharing, etc. It is one of functions as reason why students should have laptop. For instance, if we need to know about anything like what is the simple way to improve and easy to understand what we learn, and no one knows about it. If you have laptop, and yours connect with internet you just need to type what you want to know in search engine of Google, Yahoo, Bing, Wikipedia, Encyclopedia, etc.

Second of all, students can read e-book in laptop. Not only general e-books that are provided by provider, but there are also kinds of e-books of school or campus subject that we can get. Furthermore, students no need to bring many books if they go to school or campus, but they just bring their laptop.

All in all, laptop very will help everyone especially for students to help them in learning process and to load less that they bring when they go to school or campus.

dumi 1 / 6,930 1592  
Mar 30, 2014   #2
I guess I have already provided you a guideline structure to construct your intro. Hope you'd pay more attention to that :)
Let's attend to other issues with your intro;
Most of students think that laptop is the first thing that should they have to help their learning process studies at formal educations or non-formal educations. They should have a laptop even they live in cloistered ????? (sounds inappropriate at this point) villages if they take on learning process, but not all of do them have enough financial to buy it. So, how they can be finishing their duty if to finish it needs laptop? Well, if they do not have laptop to be finishing their duty needs laptop they can go to warnet or they can borrow it with their friends.

Pay more attention to clarity of your ideas. Do not cramp your sentences unnecessarily with too many big words :(
puman 6 / 13 1  
Mar 31, 2014   #3
I have to say question sentence dose not suitable IELTS essay. They want a general and objective to explain your idea.
broerjuang 5 / 6 1  
Mar 31, 2014   #4
Halo Sigit,

I want to point out your introductory paragraph. Before we begin, There are some questions that you need to ask.
1. What is the purpose of 'introduction'?
>>Literally, introduction means that you-as a writer- rise an issue to the reader. So, the reader is aware what you're talking about.

2. Do you write your issue clearly?
So, what is the issue then?

Here, in your first paragraph (I suspect it as introduction paragraph), you already had a topic

Most of students think that laptop is the first thing that should they have to help their learning process at formal educations or non-formal educations

your topic is "the students think that having lapop is necessary for learning process", Am I right? or am I wrong?

At this point, even though you already gave a context(it's good), but your long sentence may make the readers loosing your point. The last point is that you have to remember is that you are in introduction - no need argument in introduction.

Here what I mean,

finishing their duty if to finish it needs laptop? Well, if they do not have laptop to be finishing their duty needs laptop they can go to warnet or they can borrow it with their friends.

question-answer, you give an argument.
No need to dive deep in introduction (deep analysis belongs to body section).

thanks!

Juang
eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1,195 459  
Apr 20, 2014   #5
A writer needs to keep in mind that the intro is often what a reader remembers best. Your intro should be the best part of your essay. If you could, state your own opinion in the introduction itself with a statement expressing your opinion very clearly. That helps you take the reader in your desired direction.


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