Unanswered [3] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2

Study of genetics recently has enormous role in this era - IELTS 2

dimdim02 7 / 13 1  
Aug 6, 2018   #1
Genetic engineering is an important issue in modern society. Some people think that it will improve people's lives in many ways. Others feel that it may be a threat to life on earth.

Discuss both opinions and give your opinion?

the power of genetic science

Study of genetics recently has enormous role in this era. it is argued that this method can decrease mortality rate, while some opinion said that it potentially harm for human race. this essay will discuss about those point of views and the key to tackling this issue.

On the one hand, Genetic engineering could be dangerous for human if there was mistaken that is made by scientist or doctor. mistake happen because some reasons, one of them is because every human body is unique, one method may not be able to be applied for all. for those who can not survive with this method, may cause dead or deformed.

On the other hand, it would give some benefits, especially for medical world. some people who suffer severe illness such as cancer, can be helped by genetic engineering. for example, lung cancer patient will need organ transplantation which has to be 100% exactly match with patient body. since every human body is different it could not possible to find a match lung. Therefore, scientist make duplicate organ with genetic engineering method.

in my opinion, government should take control of this research to avoid malfunction. by making regulation which is not everyone can use genetic engineering, and if institution proved break the law that government made, they should be punished.

to sum up, genetical science has positive and negative side, if a failure happened, it would be harmful for the person who is taken sample of, while if nothing wrong happened, it would be good for everyone.
jalp 13 / 34 7  
Aug 8, 2018   #2
Intro: paraphrase of the prompt and your opinion.

You did not mention your opinion on this.
The 'key' is not considered an opinion but a solution to this discussion.

Potentially harms human race.
will potentially harm human race

Bp1: if there was a mistake that could be or was made

Mistakes happen because of some

I can't continue anymore because your essay needs to be corrected, grammar-wise.

I suggest that you read more books or essays with the same prompt and learn the proper way of writing and using correct tenses.

I hope this helps!

Home / Writing Feedback / Study of genetics recently has enormous role in this era - IELTS 2