Unanswered [0] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2

The study of history and knowing how to appreciate the value of history


vintagefluid 1 / -  
May 4, 2012   #1
Hi there, need your help.
This is my first GRE essay I have done, please correct my gramatical flaws and point out my logically problematic ideas, if you can also provide better ideas to support the topic are very welcome, really thank you so much!

-
Topic "The study of history has value only to the extent that it is relevant to our daily lives"

Response:
According to the author's opinion that history has nothing to do with the cases that beyond daily lives, this statement is vague and ignore the contributions of histories that are beyond than averages.

It is not difficult to understand that people easily absorb the knowledge from history when it relate to people's day-today life. Imaging law school students learned the development of how the construction of American laws established in history, from it they gained better understanding for their practicing cases and future careers. Business school students manipulate the business theories on the operation in market, these knowledges are extracted from the various cases and people in the business history. Even when people are bargaining in the flea market seems similar to several cases had happened in some telling Jewish histories. No doubt, People are experiencing the most cases fundamentally similar to those happend in history, from which they extract the core knowledges to apply on their daily life.

While history serves valuable function to the extent that beyond to daily lives as well. For instance, it is known that teenage Bill Gates had had deep understanding of Napoleon's history,with which Bill Gates later on efficiently steers his own company,Microsoft,in his twenty something age. He adoptes the knowledge from that history to manipulate the skills,like stirring rivals to loose their patient and expose their weakness then gaining the completive position, He successfully mimics the episodes from Napoleon story,by which he helped his company survive well also thrives to the monopoly status in the business industry. This is a story in an abnormal circumstance,especially Bill Gates he had dropped out from school,which demonstrates that it is hard to ignore the value of the history applying on abnormal cases.

When we have a retrospect of our history back to Socrates' tragic death happened in Greek philosophy schools,we learn that respect and appreciate those ideas from people who employ different characteristic,sometimes are even radical, that is how we human being knowing respect lives and promote ourselves to civilization. From wars in history we cherish the global peace and seek the agreement based on bilateral contentment. Those illustrations are not just relate to day-to-day lives but lead our lives to function healthy and earn respect.

In conclusion, knowing how to appreciate the value of history, and how to apply what we had learned from it on different circumstances, we need very insightful thinking and understanding,as well as the awareness of avoid the narrow-minded definition to a very limited scope.
zhonghua2412 2 / 5  
May 8, 2012   #2
While history serves valuable function to the extent that beyond to daily lives as well

-->On the other hand, history also plays a pivotal role in the extend far beyond our daily life.

it is known that teenage Bill Gates had had deep understanding of Napoleon's history

Accoring to the biography of Bill Gates, when Bill Gates was in his teenage, he read many books about Napoleon's personal history.

This is a story in an abnormal circumstance,especially Bill Gates he had dropped out from school,which demonstrates that it is hard to ignore the value of the history applying on abnormal cases.

I am not sure whether Napoleon dropped out schools or univeristies. If not this is kind of unrelated with this essay, and if yes, you had better add some words explainig both Napoleon and Bill had similar expeirience.

All above is just my oponion.Hope you can get better and better.


Home / Writing Feedback / The study of history and knowing how to appreciate the value of history