math and computing skills are essential
Several people believe that Maths is regarded as an indispensable and pivotal factor in the success of entrepreneurs. In my perspective, I am in agreement with this, although it is not necessary to master the mathematical skills; however, at least basic ones
On the one hand, the proficient combination of a wide range of sophisticated skills from relevant areas of specialization is always highly appreciated once reminding the successful business practices. For instance, some prominent skills such as problem-solving skills, critical-thinking skills, expert knowledge, and establishing a long-term relationship with patrons or potential customers are a firm foundation to generate customer's credibility and faithfulness instead of just concentrating on formulating your business.
However, the prerequisite of an entrepreneur to embark on the business is the mathematical capability to anticipate the market trend in order to determine whether it is a strategic and lucrative decision to invest or not. Moreover, processing an accurately and promptly calculating competence brings about a competitive advantage in establishing the operating schemes as well as optimizing the profit and minimizing the expense, which contributes to sustainable prosperity. If there will be no ability to deal with the numbers, the owners would be more likely to encounter troubles regarding human resources. It is obvious that how to prevent the possibility of a number of persons taking advantage of their position as founding members to deceive and misappropriate capital and assets of other persons, especially persons lacking knowledge and experience is impossible with calculating skills.
In conclusion, nevertheless, it is evident that computing skills are served as one of the essential abilities, i also acknowledge that other social and logical-thinking skills are also equally important.Congratulation, it is a quite good essay. To me, in the third passage, you should use "On the other hand" instead of "However". Well done, I think you delivered your ideas clearly, your vocab and grammars are pretty good.
I think there are some problems in your paragraph
First, your opinion in the paraphrase seems to be unrelated to your paragraph. In the paragraph, you agreed with the belief that math is essential but it is not the only way to become successful in business. However, in the paraphrase, you just said that people need to know math, at least the basic one, which will make the readers become confused.
Second, you have to add the sentence in the second paragraph to show that math is not the only way to become successful. Your second paragraph didn't indicate that and this makes readers think you are writing something unrelated to the question
That is all my opinion, I hope it will help you.
