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Succees because of hard work- luck has nothing to do with it; it has been proven


Ali110 1 / 1  
Aug 23, 2013   #1
There are a lot of persons in over the world who have always tried arduously every hour, every day in their lives but all of them are not successful or prosperous. Only a little of them have prospered it is most likely in every field from sport to cinema or even employees in a typical company. Hard work is a necessary factor but it is not enough for prospering besides lucky persons have touched situations which fell them into a very good situations for making themselves prosperous persons. Therefore I disagree with this expression you should consider luck as a very important factor in your life.

First of all, without working hard you will not be able to reach your big goals it has been proven. Because when you choose your goal which you love to reach it, you try very hard to achieve it. In this situation you should learn things which are related to your goal besides you like meeting persons who have experiences in that field. For example my friend love to become an actor but he has never been an actor. He tried really hard from continuing his education at the best university in my country to making a group including some young persons but he could not become an actor who has a

key role in a movie because he did not touch a lucky situation or a very famous director to supporting him and his ideas.

Second, Lucky persons in every steps in his lives touch a lot lucky situation which motivate them to continuing to try to reach their big goal. When you find everything around you helpful you push yourself try very hard. You work very hard until you touch a lucky situation or person who will be your ladder for reaching your goal. In this situation you will not be tired of working hard. My friend has always been very hard working person because he has touched very lucky situations which have built his connecting dots.

In conclusion, you may try very hard but without any lucky situation you will not be able to reach your goals and become a prosperous person. If you are a lucky person you meet some situations which motivate you to work much more hard without any tiredness of hard work.
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Sep 15, 2013   #2
There are a lot of persons in over the world who have always tried arduously every hour

This is not grammatically correct. Also, it does not covey your idea clearly. Better re-phrase!

Only a little of them have prospered it is most likely in every field from sport to cinema or even employees in a typical company.

Only a few of them have prospered. .... the latter part is pretty confusing.
Try this structure for your introduction;
Hook - Write a sentence that can grab reader's attention and also has a direct relevance to your prompt.
Background of the Issue - Discuss the issue by introducing the two sides of the argument.
State your opinion - Conclude your introduction with stating your opinion.


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