Jennifer Golbeck is a computer scientist who shares her super exciting research regarding to the rise numbers of social media and social network users. Most people around the globe consider that Facebook is much more interactive place to interact with others. The data has shown that Facebook has 1,2 billion users per month so about half of this earth's internet population is using Facebook.it is a networking site which allows people to get along with others and sending huge amounts of personal data online, thus, the result the computer scientist like Jennifer has hundreds of millions people's behavioral preference and demographic data which are able to build models that can predict all sorts of hidden people's personality that they even don't realize. Then, she described her favorite research which is published this year. In the proceeding of the national academies, she can predict all these attributes by looking at people's Facebook "like". In her study, she listed the five "likes" that were most indicative of high intelligence and among those was liking a page for CURLY FRIES. It must be delicious, however, liking them doesn't mean just leading a feeling appetite, but also is able to show how intelligence they are. At the last of her performance, she stated that her goal is not to figure out information about users, it's to improve the way people interact online.
Hello iedha ...
You have done great job, these following corrections are addressed to you :
... scientist who shares her
super exciting research (exciting means super ) regarding to the rise number s of social media and social network users (among these three conjungtion including and/but/or should be followed by the same structure word ).
... Facebook is much more interactive
place site to interact with others. The data (plural noun form or datum ) has have shown that Facebook it (avoid repetition by changing pronous ) has 1,2 billion users (...) of this earth's internet population is using Facebook.
I hoppefuly it is useful
Hello Iedha, Here some inputs for your writing.
soin other words about half of this earth's ... and sendingby send huge amounts of ...
the result the computer scientist like Jennifer has hundreds ...This sentence too ambiguous, not explaining well. Better if you can change it to Ms. Golbeck has released demographic data which contain millions people's behavioral preference that can be used to build models which able to predict all sorts of hidden people's personality.
Then,Moreover,she described her favorite research [...] looking at people's Facebook "like".not coherence, not understanble
....... regarding to the
numbers of social media and social network users
... the globe consider that Facebook is A
much more interactive
to interact with othershowever, the flow is hard to follow here
Most people around the globe consider ...you may need to say
: as an illustration, most people around the world.....
shown that Facebook has new
1,2 billion users per month so (...) population is using
... data online, thus, as
theacomputer scientist like Jennifer ...too complex. consist of 6 finite verbs. you may need to simplify it.
..... by looking at
people'suser[try to use certain strong word that really related to specific issue just like write 'user' instead of 'people' in writing about tech]
Facebook "like". Iat all, you are well skilled on composing sentences. however, there are many spaces for improvement and revision here in order to enhance your writing completely. good luck