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Article Summary: Shadow on the South China Sea


erwiin1 9 / 17  
Sep 29, 2016   #1
There are two sets of discords in the South China Sea. The first is about the tiny islands themselves and involves China, Taiwan, Philippines, Malaysia, Brunei, Vietnam, and limited extent in Indonesia. The second is about the spaces in between the tiny islands and that predominantly concerns the United State of America and China. China escalated an expedition to the Paracel Islands, between the coasts of China and Vietnam, and claimed them for the first time. During 1920 until 1930, France joined China and Japan in challenging the islands. This was no country consistently occupied or administered them. The bureau did not have the means to assess the islands itself so it simply copied existing maps and translated or transliterated the British names into Chinese. In doing so they included some mistakes printed on those maps.
fauziyahtami 22 / 38 6  
Sep 29, 2016   #2
Helo erwin,
Hope you doing well, let me give you several suggest
Please kindly check it out.

==>The second is about the spaces inbetween /(of) the tiny islands and that predominantly concerns ...
==> This was no country consistently occupied or administered them(No countries stood on their area) . The bureau did not have the means(permission) to assess the islands itself ...

In this case, maybe you can extend the summary by sharpening and deepening the main idea
Good Luck and keep fighting
Best regards, Tami :)
ryan31 65 / 96 15  
Sep 29, 2016   #3
hello erwin
I have little corrections for you
I think it is good enough

use connector such as after that, furthermore, etc to improve your writing

There are two sets of discords in the South China Sea.

... tiny islands themselves and involves China, Taiwan, Philippines...

The second is about the spaces in between the tiny islands and that predominantly concernsof the United State ...

... coasts of China and Vietnam, andthen claimed them ...

... joined China and Japan in challenging the islands.

thanks
keep writing
justivy03 - / 2,366 607  
Sep 29, 2016   #4
Hi Erwin, below are my thoughts for your article summary.

- The first is about the tiny islands themselvesandthat involves China,
- concerns the United States of America
- an expedition to the ParacelParallel Islands,
- During 1920 untilto 1930,
- This was nois not a country
- or administered them .
- In doing so they includedmade some mistakes printed on thosethe maps.

There you have it Erwin, as you can see, it's just a few minor details that needs modification, however, even if this are minor corrections, it will still be best not to have them in the essay or the sentences. One thing that can be done is to practice writing more and keep a complete sentence, with the linking verbs and the correct form of words that will definitely enhance the ideas of your sentences.


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