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Task 2:Supporting cultural activities may be beneficial for the population and the culture - Discuss


nobuta54 1 / 1 1  
Sep 8, 2018   #1
The government funding for art and culture

Others think supporting cultural activities may be beneficial for the population and the culture. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

People have different views about the effectiveness of financial supporting for artistic and cultural activities. In my view, the benefits of spending money on art and culture are more significant than the downsides.

On the one hand, it cannot be denied that financing for art and culture activities may occupy a large amount of money that the government can spend on other more important needs. It is extremely pricey to acquire good specimens of art and culture in order to enhance the quality of collections of museums and art galleries open to the public. Therefore, government should allocate their money on education, health care and transportation which would more directly impact on the lives of the population. By this way, citizens have been provided opportunities not only to enhance their knowledge but also to raise a higher standard of living by modern medical facilities and developed infrastructure.

On the other hand, I would agree with those who believe that allocating subsidy on art and culture is highly meaningful. The main reason for this view is that national budget for the development and sustenance of arts helps boost the country's economy. The more traditional features are displayed in each artworks, the more tourists from all over the world are attracted to the art galleries, which can generate more benefits and revenue in return. Another reason for this opinion is that it is no doubt that art is a supplement for human soul which are effective sources of venting our frustration and depression as well as improving our emotional intelligence.

In conclusion, I would argue that the advantages of spending money on art and culture do outweigh the disadvantages.
Dang Khoa 11 / 42  
Sep 8, 2018   #2
IMPRESSIVE !, i have learned how to write a real introduction of yours, you paraphrased so good while i just usually using synonyms, grammars bla bla to paraphrase and i also learn lots of new vocabs from yours. BUT! I think see some of your mistakes which is:

- 1st line( count from the essay ): financial supporting should be financially because supporting is a verb right :) ?
- 6th line: i think u use the wrong word which is "population", instead u should use "citizens" or "people" ( i know u việt nam so i will explain this for u and u will see how this is weird :), this is the translation: ".... tác động trực tiếp đến cuộc sống của "dân số" while this should be "người dân" :), u know what i mean :) !

-10th line: helps boosting not helps boost i think :)
In conclusion, i think the your essay is nearly flawless but some of the mistakes make it come "unflawless" :))) So.. good luck !
jalp 13 / 34 7  
Sep 8, 2018   #3
@nobuta54

I don't understand the 'other' side.

First view: supporting cultural activities may be beneficial for the population

Second view: government support it?

Is that the complete prompt?
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 12,289 3984  
Sep 9, 2018   #4
Pham, This is a 5 paragraph essay. The body of paragraphs need to cover 3 represented topics as per the prompt instructions. The body should be composed of:

1. Public opinion 1
2. Public opinion 2
3. Personal point of view

Or any variation thereof. By variation, I mean you can write about those topics in no particular order in the body, as long as all 3 points of view are represented. In your essay, you only cover the personal point of view in both instances. That means your essay is only partially correct in discussion format and will be scored accordingly. It will be difficult for this essay to get a passing score in this instance due to the missing discussion requirements.

Your prompt paraphrase is also incorrect because you do not represent the topic for discussion and discussion method in the correct manner. Now, it is obvious that you did not post the original prompt requirement as there is only one point of view indicated in your instructions. So I cannot show you a sample of how to properly word the prompt paraphrase.

In all honesty, this is a careless piece of work that did not take the original instructions into account when it was being written. It will not be scored well on all 4 aspects due to the haphazard writing style and lack of proper discussion presentation.


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