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Writing task 1 table with a trend - visitor statistics in Australia


dinhminhhai 1 / -  
Feb 25, 2021   #1

title:


The table below gives information on visitor statistics for 1996, 1998 and 2000 for various World Heritage sites in Australia.

The table shows data about the number of visitors for various World Heritage sites in Australia in three different years.

Overall, the visitor statistics for Great Barrier Reef was the highest while the figures for Macquarie Island was the lowest over the period shown. There was a significant increase in the number of visitors to the Great Barrier Reef.

There were several similarities in visitor statistics of the Great Barrier Reef, Blue mountains and Tasmania Wilderness. In 1996, the Great Barrier Reef was visited by 1,670,000 people compared to 526,000 and 450,000 people visiting Blue Mountains and Tasmania Wilderness. The next 4 years experienced a rise in visitors to three sites, the figure for Great Barrier Reef reached 3,200,000 people in 2000 while just 581,000 and 483,000 people visited Blue Mountains, Tasmania Wilderness respectively.

Meanwhile, there were differences between Central Eastern Rainforest Reserve, Shark Bay and Macquarie Island. Visitors travelling to Central Eastern Rainforest Reserve declined over a 4-year-period from 810,000 down to 770,000 people. In contrast, the figures for Shark Bay and Macquarie Island stabilised, at 89,000 and 300 people respectively.

i hope to see your feedbacks
i have just started so it may contains many mistake.
thank you very much!!



Holt  Educational Consultant - / 12,003 3877  
Feb 26, 2021   #2
All of your paragraphs should have a minimum of 3 sentences. This includes the summary overview. The lack of sentence development in that section has resulted in a sentence that presents information, but without a clear meaning involved in the presentation. How many heritage sites were presented? What years are involved in the survey? These are the missing overview data in your presentation that should have been presented along with the trending statement to show a clear short version of the report from the chart.

In the second paragraph, you should indicate the years of similarity and immediately follow that up with the similar information. After that, you can present the uneven measurements in the same paragraph. This will help you create a more cohesive and coherent discussion presentation for that information section. For the Macquarie Island information, it did not stabilize at 300. That would mean that the figures remained the same over the time periods indicated. There was an uneven number of visitors actually. So you should have instead, indicated a fluctuation in guest numbers during the years presented.


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