Unanswered [4] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2

Tables below present information about sales of fairtrade*-labelled coffee and bananas over Europe

just_writer 24 / 42 5  
Oct 26, 2017   #1

Coffee and Bananas sale statistics

The tables below give information about sales of fairtrade*-labelled coffee and bananas in 1999 and 2004 in five European countries.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The tables show data about agricultural products; namely, Coffee and Bananas. The given numbers compare the amount of money they made in 1999 and 2004 in UK, Switzerland, Denmark, Belgium, and Sweden. All the numbers are measured in millions of euros.

The UK income from agricultural goods raised over the years for each product. There were 1.5 million euros earning from coffee in 1999 whereas the amount increased to 20M euros in 2014. Also, the same thing happened for banana but with slower paced, from 1M to 5.5M. The Switzerland sold 3M euros of coffee in 1999 and doubled the number to 6M euros in 2004, in addition, the numbers went up for bananas from 15M to 47M respectively from 1999 to 2004.

Denmark, Belgium, and Sweden amount of income from coffee increased with low speed over the years. From 1.8M to 2M for Denmark, 1M to 1.7 for Belgium and 0.8M to 1M for Sweden. On the other hand, all of them were not been successful in bananas category; like Belgium that increased the income for 0.6M to 4M. Sweden and Denmark have a decrease over the years, as a matter of fact, Sweden sold fewer bananas, started from 1.8M in 1999 to 1M in 2004. Also, numbers for Denmark went down from 2M to 0.9M over the mentioned period.

Overall, It seems that most of the countries did better over the years. These numbers were better for the coffee category that all of them improved their market. But there were two cases of step back for Sweden and Denmark over the years. Also, the UK was the best seller of coffee in 2004 and get the second place banana category, and the situation been reversed for Switzerland.

(276 Words)

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 10,698 3502  
Oct 26, 2017   #2
The presentation of the essay information is remarkably improved from your practice essays yesterday. I guess you are getting used to writing these essays already. It shows in the manner of your paragraph development and presentation. That will result in a scoring increase for your work. However, you now show a problem with your grammar range and accuracy.

Please remember to consistently use past tense in your references as all of these information come from previously completed measurements. Therefore:

There were 1.5 million euros earning earned.
banana but with slower paced,

The country it called Switzerland, not The Switzerland. Additionally, the presentation of information in that sentence ran too long. It should have been split into 2 sentence presentations.

The discussion of the Banana category should not have been mixed in with the coffee information since that discusses a different topic. The coffee information should have been included in the previous paragraph, allowing the banana discussion to stand alone in a separate paragraph as per C&C requirements for scoring.

The mention of step back for Sweden and Denmark should have been justified with information from the chart. Without it, the reader does not know if this is accurate information being presented to them. When you say the situation was reversed for Switzerland, you should indicate what category it was. The reader already knows it was in 2004.

Home / Writing Feedback / Tables below present information about sales of fairtrade*-labelled coffee and bananas over Europe