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IELTS - Technological advances in learning methods


zarnovi 1 / -  
May 22, 2016   #1
Hi, help me to enhance my writing skills, especially on Writing Task 2 in IELTS. Your feedback is really need here..

Question : These days Internet based courses have become a popular alternative to university based courses. Some students prefer this type of learning because they do not need to attend lectures. Other argue that it is important to study at university. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Technological advances in learning system in university have allowed students to learn by viewing lectures on the internet that they mostly prefer. However, others argue that face-to-face lectures give more positive impacts. While such developments have a merit since it is efficient and effective learning method. I would argue that directly attend the general lecture will deliver much more benefits.

On one hand, viewing lectures via internet its become more efficient and effective since it was portable to access everywhere. An effective way of online learning is to assist student in self study practice, where students can finish their homework quickly. Moreover, other benefits of online learning, for example, students obtain to have instant solutions towards their problems in understanding the study materials, its related to online learning provide the access to all resources of traditional course and able to attend in different courses. However, online learning cannot offer human interaction as well as at the school where students learn how to make friends, be patient, and especially to compete.

In contrast, going to class does far more than simply giving you credit for attendance. Class attendance have variety of ways to facilitate learning practice. Firstly, many student had already understand the materials whether from internet or online access, behalf attending the class, instructor may go over examples or applications presented in a different way that apprentices has never seen before. Secondly, classroom environment provide a discussion among the pupils which countered teacher questions to enhance critical thinking skills. Finally, participating in class increase personal development of the pupils where they can interact with lectures and other students to form study groups or meet other student in related major.

In conclusion, online learning should be seen due to provide student in a way of efficiency, effectiveness, and other merits regrading student self study assistance. However, I would suggest that participate in the class give more advantages to student with the facility which not exist by online learning.

pebzna12 13 / 24 9  
May 22, 2016   #2
Hi Mal!
Here are my suggestions for your task.

1st Paragraph
I think it is better to combine these two last sentences to complete the meaning.

While such developments have a merit since it is efficient and effective learning method. I would argue that directly attend the general lecture will deliver much more benefits.

While such developments have a merit since it is efficient and effective learning method, I would argue that directly attend the general lecture will deliver much more benefits.

2nd Paragraph
On one hand, viewing lectures via internet its becomes more efficient and effective since it wasis portable to access everywhere.
self study >> self-study
Moreover, other benefits of online learning, for example, students obtain to have instant solutions towards their problems in understanding the study materials, itsis[ i] related to online learning ([i]that) provide the access to all resources of ... >> it is better to divide the sentence into two because the idea is too many so the information becomes unclear.

However, online learning cannot offer human interaction as well as at the school (university ?) where students learn how to make friends, be patient >> (in terms of what?) , and especially to compete (with others ).

3rd Paragraph
In contrast, going to class does far more than simply giving you credit for attendance . >> the meaning is not clear to me.
Class attendance haves variety of ways ...
Firstly, many students had already understand the materials whether from internet or online access, behalf attending the class >> (cannot understand the meaning) , instructor may go (...) that apprentices hasve never seen before.

... a discussion among the pupils which countered(does it has similar meaning with 'to counter'?) teacher questions to ...
... to form study groups or meet other students in related major.

5th Paragraph
In conclusion, online learning should be seen due tobecause it provides student in asuch ways ofas efficiency, effectiveness, and other merits regrading student self- study assistance. However, I would suggest that participateing in the class give (...) which not exist byin online learning.

Hopefully that will be helpful. (:
aviniwirastri [Contributor] 10 / 35 11  
May 22, 2016   #3
hi zarnovi

paragraph 1
I would argue that directly attendattending the general lecture directly will deliver much more benefits.

paragraph 2
On one hand, viewing lectures via internet its becomes more efficient and effective since it was is portableeasy to access everywhere.
... to assist student in self study practice, wherewhich students can ...
... for example, students obtain to have instant solutions towards their problems in understanding the study materials,.itsit is related to online learning that provides the access to all resources of traditional course and ableallows us to attend in different courses.

... students learn how to make friends, to be patient, and especially to compete.

paragraph 3
Class attendance havehas variety of ways to facilitate learning practice.

Firstly, many studentshadhave already understandunderstood the materials whether from internet or online access, behalf attending the class , instructor may go over (...) that apprentices hashave never seen before.

Secondly, classroom environment provides a discussion among the pupils, which countereds teacher with questions to enhance critical thinking skills. Finally, participating in class increases personal development of the pupils,wherewhich they can interact (...) to form study groups, or meet other students in related major.

comments :
your sentence structure does not clearly point out what you really mean.
you have to learn how to use appositive in order to modify the main point.
make sure you recognize the word classification (verb transitive, verb intransitive, noun, adjective and adverb) before starting to write.

re-learnt any functions of adjective clause conjunction. (who/that/which/where/when)
problems with singular and plural frequently occur, so you need to be more careful when writing.


In conclusion, online learning should be seen due toas something that provides studentsin a way of efficiency, effectiveness, and other merits regradingregarding students' self- study assistance. However, I would suggest that participateing in the class gives more advantages to student with the facility which does not exist by online learning.

comments :
task response : i think you've answered all of the task required.
coherence and cohesion : enough. but you need to explore more about using linking words as well as developing your idea more. go online and try to find some specific data needed, so your supporting idea will be rich.


nice try.
keep writing dude! -)


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