Let's check this intro with dumi's suggested structure;
With the advancement in the field of communication technology and IT sector, we now can interact with people all around the world more efficiently and conveniently.
... good hook
These development has made a world like a small village.This latest development has greatly effected our life in many goodways.
This background part has some issues. Your topic says;
So you need to introduce this same background to the reader by paraphrasing your prompt. The above background you have written does not cover everything what your prompt talks about.